User:Ununbilium/Uncyclopedia:Bank of Sophia

TO THE BANK VAULT<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Welcome to the Bank of Sophia, home of the UnDollar

Hello and welcome to the Bank of Sophia, we thank you for joining us and not our fucking rip off competitor, the Sophia Bank. We have many great offers and hope to suck all your money making business with you. The UnDollar is the award system of UNcyclopedia, and is used for awards, prize money and what not.

We deal in the Uncyclopedian Dollar Pound Sterling Rouble Franc, or like we like to call, the UnDollar, the symbol is (U) it is kept in brackets to easily tell where the hell is the money.

The form of writing this symbol in wikimarkup is:

how to write an UnDollar in wikimarkup

Current account

We offer some brilliant current account packages, with a nice and low interest rate starting from 1% APR (see terms and conditions). There are:

n008 nights

For all those who can't tell C++ objective from Java, and think Python is some kind of snake, we have the perfect account for you, since we can take all the money we want since you are a dumb NOOB and wouldn't ave a nooby idea are kind people here at the BoS, we provide an easy ATM interface which is just a button saying INSERT MONEY which makes being nabbed bank visits enjoyable and friendly.

p3454n7 package

For the average not so n00b, but not so 1337 user, we provide a substantial package that steals in a less obvious way which as a multitude of options and more complex systems that take off money ways of using your money. This is our most popular package and is highly recommended if you are a budding bankrupt entrepeneur.

1337 level

For those who can speak in 7 different computer languages and are so high up in the order, they have to duck when a plane flys by, we have a ultra robust and powerful account for those who have big money in their minds. Many options and professional advice are provided, including tips on steal the noobs and peasants money how to keep at the top in this potato eat potato world.

4dmin angel

For those who are armed with a ban stick and huffing gloves, we give you an unlimited fund and the power to pay any user an amount for their cock ups achievements.

Currency (Designs and ideas wanted)

The UnDollar is produced right here at the BoS, each fresh note made of 6 redwood trees and painted with liquid humour, one UnDollar is worth your mum, and is issued by someone who has an 4dmin angel account, although 4dmins can recieve UnDollars in their account, to show how much they contribute.

We are currently open for proposals fot the images of the currency, at the moment we are proposing this set, although any new ideas are welcome:

One UnDollar coin (U1)

Insert thumb of image here, with any text youd like to add in the captions:

Five UnDollar coin (U5)

Insert thumb of image here, with any text youd like to add in the captions:

Ten UnDollar note (U10)

Insert thumb of image here, with any text youd like to add in the captions:

25 UnDollar note (U25)

Insert thumb of image here, with any text youd like to add in the captions:

50 UnDollar note (U50)

Insert thumb of image here, with any text youd like to add in the captions:

100 UnDollar note (U100)

Insert thumb of image here, with any text youd like to add in the captions:

Exchange rates

We also allow other awards such as ninjastars and cookies to translate and represent a value of UnDollars, please put on the talk page any suggestions as we are still researching on what rates should be set.

Terms and condiditons

We will not be held viable for any terrorist attacks, goatse stampedes, Ctulhu soul consumptions, death by BENSON, self harm after hearing one of Reverend Zim's podcasts, asplosions, being fucking killed (tm) by Steve Ballmer, chocking on your tongue, forgetting to breathe, depression after being banninated, acts of god and/or Sannse, wanting to go to the loo, drinking hydrochoric acid, Hit in the face with a microphone, Beaten to death for being a nerd, Singing, Application to aNazi death camp, Being covered in gold paint:Mmmm...shiny.;38. A Sniper:Who doesn't just wanna drop like a fly one day while walking down the street?Image:Batcave.jpg|thumb|right|The criminals do it, why can't he?;37. Getting tag teamed by Superman and Batman:"Oh Em Gee! What a spiffy way to shuffle off the mortal coil!";36. Steal a F-14 Tomcat:I feel the Need, The Need for >BOOM<.;35. Feeling Lucky:Well do yah punk?;34. Ass|Suppository Explosion|C-4:You wot?!Image:LaneClosed.jpg|thumb|right|I guess he just missed all the signs.;33. Driving over the unfinished portion of a bridge:Lose your glasses, Gramps?;32. Paying for a television with cheddar on a Tuesday, in Sweden:Those crazy Swedes will use anything as an excuse, eh?;31. George Foreman Lean Mean Fat-Reducing Killing Machine:Knock out ALL the fat! 30-21 ;30. Gunned down by a plane in a corn field:The free popcorn alone is worth it.;29. A Fecal lattè:Good Lord, a what?;28. Vengeful war movie nutcase shooting spree:"CHARLIE! THEY KILLED CHARLIE! THOSE BASTARDS ARE GONNA PAY!";27. Celebrating your 21st birthday with 21 of anything on the menu:So long as it's a bar. ;26. Stay behind and fight the zombies so the others can go ahead:...that was a bright move, Sparky...;25. Coke and pop rocks:Mikey likes LIFE, and loses it.;24. My name is Inigo Montoya:You killed my father. Prepare to die.;23. Ninjas:Thousands of them.;22. Being German:For more details view Biggles.;21. Suicide:It's been a bad day, so it's time to end it all. 20-11 ;20. Ripping your own brain stem out:Showoff.;19. The Truth Pole:I don't want to get into details, but it involves a big metal pole, your ass, and your own body weight.;18. Getting your hand caught in the teeth of a combine:That's the way I want to go.;17. Boredom:"So, gentlemen, what do we do now?":"We die.";16. Method Actor|acting:Make the death scene a memorable one.;15. Arsenic:"Mmm, tastes like almonds!";14. An erection lasting more than four hours: "You'd have been fine if you'd just gone to the freaking hospital.";13. Hemlock:Random Greek Guy: Is ingesting hemlock a good way to die?:Socrates: What do you think?;12. Being covered with tuna and thrown into a pit of hungry kittens:Aw, they're so cu-AAAAAAAAAGHHHH!!!;11. Mayonnaise Kitten huffing|inhalation:It can be deadly in large quantities. 10-1 ;10. Killed by a jealous lover:Yes, you read that right.;9. Ripped apart by black hole:Because black holes and spaghettification are always cool.;8. Being a hero:We have a lot of those, but it's a pretty good way to go, I understand.;7. Dying in your sleep:Not screaming like everyone else in the car.;6. Winning an old-school duel with your arch-rival:She had it coming.;5. Dying doing what you love:...unless you love your pets.;4. Death by chocolate:This is actually much higher on my woman's list.;3. Martyrdom:Especially if everyone on your side knows you were right.;2. Natural causes:Probably old age due to reading too many top 100 lists.;1. Orgasm to death:You know it's true.

And finally, we aren't entitled to do shit, so HA.