User:SystemPhantom/article ideas
here are some ideas for articles i plan to make
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Onosecond: measurement of time invented by Tom Scott.
“The "onosecond" is the second after you make a terrible mistake. The second when you realise what you just did and that there's nothing you can do about it, the second when all the now-inevitable consequences flash through your mind. It is the second after you send a text message to the wrong person, after you delete the wrong file, after you spill the secret that you thought they already knew. The "onosecond" is that stomach-dropping, breath-stopping moment, when all you can do is say "oh, no".”
The Technical Difficulties: The comedy troupe consisting of members Tom Scott, Matt Gray, Gary Brannan and Chris Joel. My plan for this article is to make it like some sort of mafia with Mad Cap'n Tom Scott as the leader. I also plan to make "Tom Scott", "Matt Gray", "Chris Joel" and "Gary Brannan" redirect to this article. My first draft of the article is below:
Led by Mad Cap'n Tom Scott, The Technical Difficulties is the most feared gang in all of England. Despite being only four members in size, nobody dares to step too close to their territory out of fear, for these four men possess powers of calibre untold.
Mad Cap'n Tom Scott: both the brains and the brawn of the operation, with decisiveness outsmarting even the greatest of commanders, and a visceral, brutal manner of combat that makes even the toughest of men surrender. Scott tends to get up close and personal with his trusty cutlass, as it's hard to lead your men to the front lines from a distance, after all. Serving a background role is not what Scott does; if you're under attack by Scott, you best believe he'll make his presence known.
Matt Gray: Expert driver of the one and only Mattmobile, custom-fitted with illegal parts and an extra large trunk for all the gang's tools and weapons. Although you're supposed to drive on the left side of the road in Britain, it doesn't seem to matter for Gray since everyone swerves out of the way once they lay eyes on the Mattmobile. Matt tends to be more of a logistics man, delivering supplies and transporting the other three men to the right place at the right time, but if he must do the dirty work, he'll drift the Mattmobile into battle with just enough time to ensure his targets won't escape a head-on collision with the Mattmobile, an encounter very few live to tell the tale of.
Gary Brannan: Gary's studied millennia worth of weapon design, using the thousands of archival materials memorized in his brain to forge the team's weapons to the highest degree of quality there is. His swords the sharpest around, his rifles the most accurate, his bows the strongest and his shields the most durable; the tools of Brannan's craftsmanship are single-handedly responsible for winning the gang hundreds of fights and thousands of people's hearts. Brannan does it all; there's no weakness in him to be found. When you're up against Brannan, you best know he has more experience and knowledge with weaponry than an army thousands large combined. Whether it be by musket, by bow, by dagger, sword or mace, it's only a matter of time before he smashes your face.
I haven't written Chris Joel's bit yet.
made up ideologies[edit | edit source]
Exactism: Fallacious ideology based on the idea that one should strive to make exact measurements rather than just guessing a number that seems good enough; it would obviously be much better for society if we didn't waste so much time on lining up our rulers juuuuust right.
Cyclism: Political ideology based on cyclists. Policies of cyclism include capital punishment for car users, bicycle mandates, and installation of Dutch as an official language.