User:Symuun/Lego JFK Assassination

Fun for all the family!

The Lego® JFK Assassination® set for children aged 7 years and older lets you re-enact the assassination of American president John F. Kennedy, your way! Send the motorcade down Dealey Plaza, place the Lee Harvey Oswald® action figure in the Texas Book Depository, and let the fun begin!

Contents

The Lego® JFK Assassination® set contains the parts to make two cars (complete with passengers), the Texas Book Depository® building, seven "innocent" bystanders, two suspiciously inattentive police officers and, of course, Lee Harvey Oswald®, the framed innocent evil Communist responsible.

Hours of fun!

Use realistic Lego® Blood (sold separately) to show the shooting.

Tell the story the way you think it should be told (Just like the CIA did). Was it a plot by the evil Lego® Communists®? (sold separately) Did JFK engineer his own assassination? Any re-enactments implicating any government agency's involvement in President Kennedy's assassination are punishable by six months in Guantanamo Bay. Combine this set with your other Lego® sets to make up your own adventures.

We all know that JFK was the one who was murdered that day (or was he?), but now you can solve the mystery of who did it, and why. Perhaps the CIA arranged a plot to kill him, working in a pact with hordes of aliens led by Elvis himself. Of course, we all know this isn't what really happened. Ha-ha-ha.

Features

• Transform Live JFK into Dead JFK at the touch of a button! Flip the concealed switch under the JFK Limousine and a seat underneath exchanges the two figures. Enjoy touch-and-go moments as the President hovers between life and death, under your control!
• Adjust the size of the bullet! Ranging from the size of a grain of salt to Wikipedia's "grapefruit-sized chunk o' flesh" margin, take out the president in style!
• Hit John Connally too! Let a LEGO® bullet or two, or four perpetually enter the 40th governer of Texas at your whim! With 60 fully articulate and mutilatable pieces, missing JFK is half the fun! Will it pierce his right nipple before hitting his wristwatch and ricocheting into his colon? Or will it embed itself into his foot, rendering him hangnailed for life? You decide!
• Free Create-a-Conspiracy booklet!

Other works by the creators

See the assassination from a new perspective. Is there really only one assassin?

Death of a President

Ever heard of a movie called Death of a President? Y'know, the one where George W. Bush dies? Classic. We made it. Over here in the north regions of the world, we can sit atop our chocolate, pocket-knife-adorned thrones and say "screw it" to the rest of the Earth. That way, we can make more Lego®'s for all you helpless but rich escapist geeks kids!

Alternate reality game

As stated by our illustrious gods above, the alternate reality game was released to sell our product. This was the REAL start of National Try To Assassinate The President Day, and the Great Time Travel War of 1871.

Other versions

If you wish to experience the death of JFK in a new and exciting way, you may be interested in our three other consumption methods:

1. Death of a President: the Prequel, our new CGI movie paid for by your tax dollars to educate the people of today. Done all in Lego.
2. Inhalation
3. Injection

Conclusion

We would give you more info, but that would stop you capitalist pigs from spending 50+ Dollars for a worthless piece of studded, mass-produced plastic. Good day!

Other sets in this series

Lego® Auschwitz

This set is part of the Lego® History® series, designed to teach children history while they have fun. Other sets include:

• Lego® D-Day - Blow up over 2 hundred thousand Lego® soldiers with the miniature Lego® Artillery® set (sold separately)
• Lego® Moon Landings - Build the set, put the television cameras in place and then have the "astronauts" land their "spaceship" on the "Moon". We know the truth, NASA.
• Lego® Auschwitz - Complete with gas chamber and SS guards. Jews sold separately.