User:Striker2117/My Sojourn with Mr.Winkler to steal a Euroipod from a grue:A Retrospective

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This article is under construction for the The Article Whisperer writing competition.
Which means that, Striker2117 should only be edited by the author until the competition has ended... No, seriously. Please do not edit this article!

It may seem far-fetched or ludicrous, but the article in question raises some of the greatest philosophical debate of all time. All of the ground-breaking characters and their strange strengths and flaws, their uncanny behavior, and their allegorical linkage to every person's heart; make this single Uncyclopedia article a life-changing read.

Summary of the Article for those Who Have Never Read It[edit | edit source]

The article that this retrospective examines can be difficult to locate, as it does not yet exist. Therefore this non-existent article is summarized below.


At the beginning of the article, the narrator is sitting in his English class when his English teacher, Mr. Winkler, tells him to read a gay book. After not reading the book because he had to participate in various other activities, Mr. Winkler gives him an "F". To get revenge on Mr. Winkler, the narrator concocts a plan to make him "get some sick." Twenty years later, the narrator reflects on his actions, feels remorse for his horrible deed, and decides to redeem himself by getting Mr. Winkler the rarest present he can think of, a Euroipod. Unable to find one of the exquisite objects, he reveals his plan to Mr. Winkler (now "gay and stupid and ugly and retarted and fat") who suggests that they go on an adventure to find it. They know that the only place to find a Euroipod is in Europe and they quickly make their way there only to find that the object of their desires lies deep within a cave. They both explore the cave, but discover that their beloved treasure is guarded by a grue, forcing one of them to distract it while the other steals the object. The narrator selflessly allows himself to be violated by the grue to provide a distraction for Mr. Winkler to steal the object. On the way out, the grue eats the narrator's left arm. After making it outside, they both discuss the philosophical ramifications and meanings of every little detail that was encountered during the entire story.

Character Analysis[edit | edit source]

Mr. Winkler[edit | edit source]