User:Redundant Visionary/Meatatarianism

Plants are the holders of pure spirit. Plants are untainted and are superior to animals because of their pure energy. The eating of plants is not advisable, that would offend the great Green Spirit.

We should instead kill all the herbivores because they are evil. Yes I'm sure you thought those innocent doe eyed grass munchers were so angelic and all but now it is time to shed the blood of the evil spirit eaters. Cast your bullets into their unthinking eyes and do something good for mother earth.

Animated sprite from the popular Meatatarian video-game Destroy all Cows

Remember that vegetarians are also animals that eat plants exclusively. And did you know eating plants causes your blood to run pale green? This affected blood will weaken you and cause you to listen to podcasts , eat pistachios, and make a blog about hating people. And hating people is wrong because they are the sole keepers of the Green Spirit , and protect her from the evil plant eating monsters. Like rabbits.

Dietary guidelines

It is simple, you must eat anything that chews the cud , and does not have cloven hooves. Or was it the ones who do have cloven hooves? Wait was it the ones who trod on four-leaf clovers?(It is an unpardonable sin to pick four leaf clovers , you may thinks it is lucky but it will send you straight to hell.)

Anyway lets cut through all the religious white tape. Eat herbivores , and plants who hurt other plants too much. Like strangler figs.

How to convert to Meatatarianism

Converts are advised to construct a This is a Sacred Carnivorous Plant earthenware jar for their new Green Spirit shrine. (Not to be confused with the Green Giant's nether region) Green members will achieve the ability to have a larger physical body , and have a small title above their heads powered by green spirit energy that says Green Member.