User:Orian57/UnBooks: A Comming Out Tale

It took me longer than most to realise who I was. It made my early teenage life hell. It was so isolating, seemingly being the only one who was “that way”. People always assumed they knew what I was like and how I should act. My dads had my whole life planned out for me but that was just not what I wanted, as much as I hated to disappoint them.

I was straight.

Part 1: Self-realisation

It wasn't until the first week of ninth grade that I realized the distinction between having feelings for the opposite sex rather than your own. I was in the lunch line with my fervent friends, who were having a conversation on how Brad was totally hotter than Johnny, when I saw her for the first time. At the time, I hadn't thought much about the opposite sex. All I knew was that dad and dad said they were 'really gross'. But she was different. Her lily-white skin, the amber hair that draped in a shining wrap of brown, those deep, russet eyes that shone like pearls, and the soft curvature of her body that mesmerized me so. Before I knew it, I had a boner.

One of my best friends, Pete, was the first to notice.

"Oh. My. Gawd! Lyle has a bo-" I gave him a proper uppercut before he could finish.

Before long, I was in Principal Howard's office, and the balding little man was hunched over his desk, eyes locked on little ol' me, sunken in my chair.

"Lyle," he said in that voice I soon learned to hate "did you punch that boy in the face?"

"Yes, sir..."

"Did you know the boy?"

"Yes, sir. He's a friend of mine, or at least he used to be."

"Oh- OH! ...I see... were you two close friends?"

"Very. Actually, now that I think about it, the only reason I hung around him was because he would tickle my fancy every once in a while. Now I realize what he's really like. What an ass..."

"Oh..." he said, with growing interest. "Are you jealous?"

"Of what?"

"Hmm? Nothing. Go on, what was your relationship like with Peter?"

"Well, I seemed to have reached a climax my relationship with him. I'm glad I got to hit him hard, in the face, nonetheless, before I got expelled..."

"Expelled? You couldn't be farther from the truth! I understand your dilemma, Lyle! I know how hard it is to keep a relationship like yours firm for a long time. Most people simply don't grasp the the sheer girth of a special case like yours, it's hard enough to penetrate the concept as is, Lyle. Oh, look at me, dribbling on like an old coot, go on, boy!"

"What else is there to say? He's a well-rounded kid, but he can be a complete dick sometimes. I'm just sick of the guy riding my ass and treating me like a play-thing. He thinks he can just burst out with no warning like that and not expect me to get mad?"

"Oh-ho-ho! Simmer down Lyle! I understand! It's hard to have a special relationship in a society like ours, I know. The wayward stares, the insecurity, the pain-"

"Pain, sir?"

"Anal hurts like hell, doesn't it?"

After that, big men with guns visited Mr. Howard's office. I heard lots of rumors, but suffice it to say Mr. Howard isn't my principal anymore...

I walked home that day pondering what Mr. Howard had said. "Special" relationship? What did he mean by that? I decided to ask my dads.

So there I was at the dinner table, poking at the gluten-free soy cube, when I asked my dads about the way I am for the first time.

"Dad?"

"Yes?", they both responded.

"Um... "

Part 4: Telling Dads

"How could you do this to us! It wasn't how you were raised!" groaned Gene trying to hold back his tears.

"Dads... I meant what I said. I'm straight." I told them stubbornly.