User:NoNamesLeft/Shall we dance?

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Background information

Argument

Yes

Pro side

No

Neg side

Argument

Yes

"To dance or not dance?" - that isn't even a question!! There's no dancing around the issue: We just gotta dance! It can't be helped; dancing has been culturally choreographed into countless key facets of human movement, be they transcendental steps to the sublime or strident missteps to the ridiculous. Dance is inherently beyond debasement. It is above reproach. As Oscar Wilde once declared whilst curtseying in accordance with New York customs concerning his admission to a country ballroom dance, "there are no good dances or bad dances, but merely well-performed and poorly-performed dances."

So regardless of whether one is doing the Humpty Dance out on the club floor (and thus looks like M.C. Hammer on crack), is dancing alone in the dark, or is being judged as a contestant in the Can-can World Cup by a blue-ribbon panel of dance-off deity, the effect is the same: When we dance, angels run and hide their wings. Indeed, dance is the divine counter-balance to the providential gift of music that the mythical Lords of the Dance bestowed upon humanity - and humanity alone - many eons ago as told to us by our ancestral bards of legendary knowledge made up from the imaginary past. Dance is the alpha and the omega of human life itself. Hence we dance the night away, wishing we could dance this dance forever; we tap-dance around thorny topics and questions best avoided, and when we pompously strive to dance like angels on the pinhead of a needle, we body-slam-dance our way back to the floor and then make sure keep it real by he need arises to kick it Old School we break down the cardboard boxes and breakdance back to dancing in the streets across our nation.

Of course, sometimes all is not footloose and fancy-free in dream world of dance. Dancing is universal and timeless, but it is not protected from all-out frontal assaults - such as Orwellian bans against dirty dancing and lap dancing - and dancing as a whole may suffer grave, long-lasting harm as a result if protective measures are not implemented . Contingencies must be rehearsed for. If and when the proverbial "Russian judge" awards a negative score for a flawlessly executed, infinitely graceful, and unsurpassably passionate tango performed by unrivaled masters in the art of exotic couples dancing during an international, competitive dancing exhibition, we must be ready to dance circles around such a foe. The response must be synchronized measure for measure, in perfect step. When the Russian reveals the offending score, we must take to the floor, draw loaded six-shooters from our hip holsters, point the barrels at the judge's feet, and say the magic words: "dance, pardner!"

A time-tested song and dance will remind even the most determined dance-hater that gunshot feet have got no rhythm. Should even that fail to convince an infidel of dance to move with the music, the call must sound for Zorba the Greek.

"Just dance!"

No

Neg side

Verdict

Write the verdict here.