User:Multiliteralist/more carbon monoxide

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The chemical properties of carbon monoxide.

Bandwagon, the proud vehicle of all colonists, has not been forgotten yet. Upon hearing about the plans to replace carbon dioxide with carbon monoxide in all archaeologial measurings, The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change reacted quickly and made appropriate changes to the Kyoto Protocol. This will result in implementing a new carbon-monoxide-based taxation system to all archaeological study within the next 12 months.

"We see this as an inevitable step in trying to reduce the use of any carbon-based monoxides within scientific study", clarified the IPCC spokesman Jackson Spokesman in a messy and disappointing press conference. He further pantomimised: "Before we can rest easy, what with all the carbon things in our climate, we will have to take even more drastic measures encompassing all the aspects of your life! We will need to lay down the law on carbohydrates in people's diets. We will need to clamp down on carburetors. And last but not the least, we will need to curb the amount of garderobe people have in their closets. Even those who are yet to come out of the closet will have to comply with these rigorous new standards we are standardising", floated Mr. Spokesman.

When asked whether scientific study really uses all that much of carbon monoxide - which, by the way, is highly dangerous if inhaled from the exhaust pipe of a car - Mr. Spokesman had to ask his aides for some facts for a change. "It is clear", he then resorted, "that scientific study has no right to use up any more carbon monoxide than their quota dictates." "Furthermore", he amalgamated on, "these questions are obviously very disturbing in the current explosive carbonic situation. We don't want this to turn into political dynamite or a hot potato for the anticlimactic agencies that lurk all around." The hint was taken by all. We refrained from exhaling until we were at a safe distance. All of this happened today - did I really forget to mention that?