User:Moneke/Bleen
I shall tell ye a tale 'bout love and loss, triumph and tragedy, algorithms and derivatives of exponential logarithmic functions. No one truly knows whether the legend of "Bleen" (if that be its name) is truth or some creation of a man possessed. Many a wee lad has asked that question, none have answered it.
Th' Legend Ay Bleen[edit | edit source]
Bleen is believed to have been forged in the forges of hell out of pure hate, malice, loathing, greed, sin, molten lead, suffering, and tortured kittens. After being cooled for 2 million millennia, Bleen was then coated in the most lead filled paint from the deepest Mattel factories in all of Xiangxing.
Havin' bin forcibly restrained by th' devil himself for a further million years, Bleen was released from th' fiery depths ay hell, tae reek havoc oan th' world. Unfortunately it was rush hour on a Thursday so Bleen decided it was better to stay in hell and watch repeats of Two And A Half Men (the only show other than Dr Phil available on HellTV) for the next million years.
After one particularly heated poker game with God, Satan and the prophet formally known as Mohammad (who he played poker with every Saturday), Bleen was caught cheating. As a punishment he was sent to the only place worse than hell; Carl's Jr. As further punishment for cheating God out of his hard earned souls (as thats what they use as currency in eternity... it comes up in the bible somewhere), Bleen was banished to the lowest form of existence, a number (Doing math forever... thats worse than death).
So Bleen was enrolled in the Baghdad college of Arabic Numerals, in the class of 776.
In Mathematics[edit | edit source]
BLUE FUCKING GREEN.
In Science[edit | edit source]
GREEN FUCKING BLUE
In Computers[edit | edit source]
- 0000ff FUCKING #00ff00
In Religion[edit | edit source]
GREEN BLUE FUCK
In Literature[edit | edit source]
GREEN BLUE FUCKING
In Art[edit | edit source]
Bleen is also the name of a color invented by the level 165 super-genius Kelly Bundy. The name is derived from her attempt at creating a color which combined the appearance of blood and spleen for children who enjoyed creating illustrations of extra-gory traffic accidents. It was later revealed that Bleen was also a miraculously powerful hair tonic, able to immediately and completely restore a full head of hair in as little as one use. Ms. Bundy won the Nobel Prize in the area of Artistic Advancement/Hair-Care Products in the year 20XX. Sadly she died less than a year later from chronic radioactive exposure to Tang-389.
In Sports[edit | edit source]
FUCKING GREEN BLUE
In music[edit | edit source]
FUCKED BLUE GREEN
In All Other Fields[edit | edit source]
SAGE
Names and Insults[edit | edit source]
Your mother is bleen. You were born bleen. Your father fucks bleen men.