User:MaxPayne/History Channel:Battle for the Pacific

History Channel greatly prides itself on it's historical accuracy in it's TV shows and books, and makes no less of an effort to reach that accuracy in it's video game History Channel: Battle for the Pacific. In this video game, History Channel perfectly recreates World War II's Battle for the Pacific, having the American G.I.'s face off against Hirohito's Japanese people.

America's Identical Twins fighting Japan's identical twins in a jungle that's identical to the last one on every single level.

Coming Soon from History Channel: Steven Ambrose presents <insert name here> playing History Channel: Battle for the Pacific, where the History Channel gloriously recreates <insert name here>'s attempt to play the actual game, and instead has to pause the game in several attempts to search for the crouch and/or sprint key.

Game Overview

Here's what we learned: 8-10 literally identical twins stormed Imperial Japan and took the Philippines and Iwo Jima, and were met with heavy Japanese resistance, whose soldiers also looked indistinguishable, which is not to be confused with racial prejudices about all Asians looking alike or that Battle for the Pacific's budget only allowed the creation of two character models.

Though Hirohito's boys outnumbered the Americans 1000-to-1, they blew their numerical advantage with thoughtless tactics and a near total inability to shoot straight. In contrast to the Japanese soldier's dogged determination to expose himself to enemy fire while running to the precise patch of dirt where dozens of his countrymen just died, his American counterpart had to remain within 25 yards of his commanding officer at all times, and died the second he disobeyed and, say, wandered 26 yards away. Hooray.

The Americans then stormed the jungle, laying waste to hundreds of Japanese before being halted by a sudden game crash to desktop, leaving the G.I.'s stranded in the 64-bit edition of Vista.

Gameplay

The game is a first-person shooter, played from the perspective of an unnamed soldier that is unremarkable in every aspect. Most game takes place in high-paced battle sequences, which involve a great deal of shooting. But because the history Channel doesn't endorse violence, shooting someone doesn't produce any amount of blood at all, and opening fire on your friends does absolutely nothing, thanks to the outstanding new technology of Gameplay Options, where the Americans can change the difficulty of the war they're fighting, change friendly fire on and off, and even turn the volume down so that battles don't disturb the nearby Japanese civilians.

One of the core gameplay features involves following people to their instant, scripted death but will often be delayed by your "guide" standing in place idly and staring at a wall, running back and forth in one spot, or generally just forgetting where he's going (or so it seems). For the rest of the game, you’ll follow the Sarge back and forth as you travel to a location, retreat from the location, gather reinforcements, and retake the location.

Characters

Battle for the Pacific features two characters that are actually not identical to the rest of the bunch (we think)-

• You- No further details given in the actual game.

• Sergeant- A noticeably invincible American soldier who takes out enemies like Rambo and never even flinches, but may run back and forth or stare at a wall for no apparent reason. He likes to encourage his soldiers, sometimes yelling for you to

Hang in there! even though you are having no apparent difficulty against the Japanese troops.

Multiplayer

Multiplayer is an unforgettable experience, especially since no one is playing the game. Have fun playing with yourself.

Graphics

The spectacular, life-like graphics engine fails to betray BftP. The game is so completely real that even the most utterly devastated radios still have no visible damage to their body, and the jungle battle scenes feature a few rocks and maybe a tree or two. But those few rocks and trees look utterly spectacular. Take my word for it.

A shot of HCBFTP's lifelike graphics.