User:Magic man/Mariachi Band

These are our wives, the bandidas. From right to left: Chiquita, Fernánda and Jane.

Hola, everyone, welcome to Mariachi Band Q and A, and thank you for coming. my name is Carlos, and these are my amigos. Introduce yourself, chicos. My name is José. I'm Bill. And we are... The Banditos! Feel free to ask as many questions as you like, we've got all day, as we don't actually have any gigs... But that's okay, right, Bill? Right, because we still have each other. And while that may not help us feed our extremely large families, at least we'll have two other people to be poor with... Anyway, let's start this off. Yes, you, sir?

"I'm sorry, but Bill doesn't sound like a very Mexican name. In fact, you don't even look like you are from Mexico, are you?"

This is a group photo of my previous mariachi band. We weren't that good.

Well, no, I was actually born in Portland, Oregon. But I think I fit in pretty well with the chollos.

What?!

O-oh, sorry, I meant chicos. See, I don't actually speak spanish, but I play the guitar, so I don't need to.

We actually hired Bill to be our manager, but after out other guitar player, Ernesto, died in a fire, we desperately needed a guitar player. He told us he used to be in another mariachi band, so we hired him.

Next question please. Yes, you ma'am.

"You said you all had extremely large families, would you like to tell us more?"

Oh, yeah, I don't know what Bill was talking about, I have a small family, only fourteen children. Abejundio, Agraciana, Yvelisse, Javier, Jorge, Lobo, Pedro, Pilar, Rocio, Camiria, Maribel, Miguel, Seferino, and Victor. And me and my wife have only had sex twice. Not like Carlos, he has twenty-six kids, and they were all born on their own.

And I have two kids, Cory and Nikki. Cory's thirteen and Nikki's nine. And I tell you what, they are a handful! Just the other day Nikki asked if she could upgrade her phone from an Iphone3G to an Iphone4, and when I said she'd have to wait about a week, she cried for two hours! Ah, kids these days...

Yeah... niños these days... Anyway, could we get the next question? You, sir?

"You said you don't currently have any gigs. Do any of you have other jobs for when this happens?"

Not to mention my terrible working conditions.

Oh, yes, we all do. I work for a maid service.

And I pick fruit on weekends.

And I'm the founder and CEO of a very profitable company that sells uncut diamonds to refineries. None of us make too much, I only have a six figure income, but it's enough to get by. You had your hand raised, sir?

"Um... Where do you tend to play when you do have gigs?

Well, we are mostly hired to play at mexican restaurants and Quinceañeras, but we'll play anywhere.

Actually, we could play right now, if you area all up to it. Are you?

Yeah.

Vamos a hacerlo.

Mierda, they all left... what now?

Taco Bell?

*Sigh* Fine.

Fine...