Don't vote for my dog!
My dog, Buddy, is the worst. He's just terrible. Don't vote for my dog! Don't vote for this article. It shouldn't be featured on encyclopedia. It doesn't align with our website's values. I'll explain everything...
Reasons not to vote for Buddy
Evidence
I don't make these kinds of remarks lightly. I have both edited enhanced photos and logic to back up my statements. I'm not saying any of the above things are bad. They aren't in an of themselves. It's just he is the most extreme radical version of all of these things and this article, under no circumstances should be featured because of it.
He's gay
I have an audio clip of Buddy saying the following:
“I'm cookoo for dudes! Any dude. Right now.”
– Buddy on dudes
You heard him. He's a gay dog. I don't mean gay. I mean creepy gay. Even worse he's a bottom. My gay dog can't even be a top. He just sits there taking dog cock all day. Any cock. The dirtier, the sleazier the more disease riddled the better. Don't vote for Buddy!
He's a yeast infected Cunt
When forced to choose between a manly bowl of pork rinds, dirt, protein powder and armpit hair versus a strawberry cheesecake sundae with a tampon sticking out of it, he goes for the Sundae. He is an embarrassment to my household. Don't feature any article with my dog in it.
He hates America
He drives a mini car from France, quotes his weight in kilograms, only watches football to see men in tight shorts and is a gay socialist Jihadist who shits out rainbow diarrhea all over the American flag, every single day. Where does he even get that many American flags? My neighbours are going to burn my house down. Please don't vote for him.
Summary
With all of this legitimate evidence, one could say that Buddy is a gay yeast infected cunt who hates America. The most radical extremist kind. Why would you vote to have him featured?
If you vote for Buddy
You will regret it.[1]
Notes
- ↑ I'll fuck you up.