User:Hrodulf/World Peace

Terrorism exists because it works. If we want terrorists to stop killing people, we should stop rewarding them for it. Therefore, we should implement my three four step happiness plan for world peace and pancakes:

1)Illegalize possession and use of gasoline.
2)Set up a brothel in Nevada (where hookers are legal for some reason) and offer sexually frustrated suicide bombers seventy hookers without having to kill themselves (ok, they won't be virgins, but that's a trade off for surviving. Although having sex with seventy women may prove fatal anyway (unless you're me, of course, but you're not. Too bad for you)).
3)Give Israel to Michael Jackson. He has as much right to it as anybody does!
4)Everybody gets pancakes!

Don't like pancakes you say? Prefer pie? Try Plan B:

1)Give Israel to the arabs, but let the jews have casinos there. Then after ten years, let the arabs have the casinos, and let the jews run the country (note, this plan only works for 20 years, because after 20 years, the jews won't want to give the casinos back)
2)Airdrop calendars in arab countries, to remind them of what year it is. Once they realise it isn't the 15th century, maybe they will stop this jihad nonsense and get jobs in middle management.
3)Give all arabs free copies of ultima online, computers, and internet service. Problem solved.
4)Everybody gets pie!

Remember, my peace plan is the only one that will work. Thanks for listening!