User:Ex-aloof-FPI/Urdu

A God bless'ed nation cursed by opinions

Urdu has long been a word deemed holy by the Baby Jesus, as such certain nations such as Judea, Uranus, and netpune have all had different ways of pronouncing it's holiness, the nation of Judea believed it was a misspelling of "Ur doomed!" during an intense multi-game of Halo, in which a character was made so alike Jesus, that they believed he was able to properly rule their great kingdom.

Uranus on the other hand have constantly believed it was a misspelling of "rude!", a holy proclamation by Jesus during the 3rd century BC during the holy starvation of the Marqueers.

Common summary

An insightful research team from Cambridge have coined a new term, by means of killing a cow and saying "Ha! Indians'll be turning in their graves" and deducing that this unique word is pronounced mole-ten oordoo, rhymes with freakin' hair-do. We are yet to settle on exactly what a 'Molten-Urdu' signifies, but for now, we give you what the experts disagree on. Researchers at The University of Barbaric Studies are unanimous in their disagreement that Molten-Urdu, which is quite famous today, and takes its roots from French literary criticisms on 'Urdu', is quite simply a special dialect that caters to select speakers of various regional languages in the Indian subcontinent, which includes North and South India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Bombay, Maldives, India, North Korea and un-named sections of Kashmir and California. Though Californians aren't really that dumb, Molten-Urdu is quite a delicate plaything when in their possesion, and they tamper with it evidently. Although Orange County and Bangalore are far from appreciating its effects, a time will come when they will be forced to succumb. Just wait till Manchester United and The Lakers sign a coalition of eternal constituents, and you will realize that the prediction is quite accurate.

Origins

The term 'Urdu', as everyone knows, was automatically generated by a secular-Derridean website, by typing a five-letter code into one of those tiny boxes. Some confused individuals claim that it is a new net-speak word that is synonymous with 'Your do, not mine'. This was cheaply shortened to 'Urdu'. Urdūk-hai (اردو), synonymous with Urdu, Molten-Urdu, Urduk-Hai (in familiar Tolkienologist circles, bounding from the discovery of a dark cave of the same name where J.R.R Tolkien was believed to have been born*), and Uri Gellar; was a dark language discovered in the black country(s) of Great Britain during the long days of 1781. Improved upon by Uri Gellar during the more prominent of his spoon-bending years, the language continued to be the primary one of Buddy Guy, Freddy Mercury, Samuel L Jackson, and Uri Gellar during his less prominent spork-fending years.

*In the black country of Greater Britain (along with a sausage and a pudding, bounding the discovery of the black country sausage and pudding.)

Standardisation

Uru actually refers to a standardised, molten, subset of Hinduswani, a Pastafarian subset of Hirdu, invented by Gandhi and Noam Chomsky. It should be noted that the fancy handwriting often found in all languages derived from Sanskrit (also created by Gandhi and Noam Chomsky) are commonly unfairly unattributed to Oscar Wilde's school of bollywood writing for the fallen. In fact, in reality, Gandhi believed that 'Urdu' was a pro-sensationalist movement during the Caribbean Civil War, but this was far from the truth. Till date, we do not know what the truth is. But, as Confucius has always said "The socio-melancholic politics of a surfboard cannot be judged by mere man. It takes three to screw the bulb... errr..."