User:Coffi/Robert Anderson
Robert Anderson is an enigmatic figure rumored to be the hidden mastermind behind several of Uncyclopedia's most chaotic articles. Despite scant verifiable information, dedicated editors have pieced together a patchwork biography that often contradicts itself, suggesting either multiple Robert Andersons or one with an exceptionally flexible timeline.
Early Life[edit | edit source]
Very little is known about Anderson's birth—some claim he emerged fully formed from a stack of unsigned edits in 2018, while others insist he was once a humble sockpuppet under the alias "SocksAnderson42." Reports indicate that his formative years were spent wrestling with Wikipedia's neutrality policy and later defecting to Uncyclopedia after discovering the joys of deliberate misinformation.
Career Highlights[edit | edit source]
Founding of the Helmet Group — According to sketchy sources, Anderson co-founded the infamous Helmet Group, a clandestine society of editors dedicated to adding gratuitous images of medieval helmets to unrelated articles.
The Great Rizz Incident — In 2023, Anderson allegedly uploaded a banned gif of Nicolas Cage that caused over 50 talk page arguments before it was finally removed by Administrator Alula.
Polandball Collaboration — Anderson is credited being the Sockmaster of Falco, who drew the first draft of the Polandball comic that later became a community staple, though the final version bears no resemblance to his original stick-figure art.
Personality and Skills[edit | edit source]
Anderson is said to possess a unique combination of charisma and chaos: editors rarely agree on his motives but universally acknowledge his ability to spawn edit wars single-handedly. His specialties include:
Sockpuppetry — Mastered to the point where even other sockpuppets are confused about who they're responding to.
Meme Integration — Seamlessly weaving outdated memes into serious-sounding prose.
Temporal Paradoxes — Often references events that took place "next Tuesday" in articles dated 2019.
Legacy[edit | edit source]
Whether hero or villain, Anderson's legacy looms over Uncyclopedia. New users are warned about the "Phantom Anderson Edits," edits that appear overnight with no user attached, leaving only cryptic summary lines like "Because why not?".