User:BlueRhythmJohnny

wtf?

For the record, I AM THE ONE WHO INVENTED "Vin Diesel owns all cars, and invented the Vin number to keep track of them." Ha! Ha ha ha! HA! There it is bi-a-tch, that is my edit, I am a fucking comic genius!!!!!!!! Give me my props yo!

Bolo Yeung is the large Chinese martial arts master who was defeated by Jean Claude Van Damme in Bloodsport, but in real life would have used Van Damme as a brush with which to paint the walls with blood. Van Damme's blood. Bolo was created in a top secret experiment by the Chinese government involving lightning, Dracula, and kryptonite, in the Chinese quest to create an answer to Vin Deisel. Well, they came close.

Bolo is so named because of his ability to capture deer by hurling himself spinning for hundreds of yards, entwining their legs with his lengthy penis. He regularly exercises not by doing push-ups, but rather by doing push-downs - he pushes the earth out of its orbit, then yanks it back in. Bolo's already world-class fighting skills are accentuated by his ability to anticipate attacks through his hypersensative nipples.

If you have slanty eyes, Bolo Yeung is probably your dad. If your mom walks kinda funny, that seals it.