User:02barryc/UnNews

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This IRC Transcript has been edited heavily lightly, however, this is almost the original in which it was broadcast:

Good Evening, the time is 12:00 GMT and Welcome to the UnNews Midight Bulletin!
I'm BarryC, your presenter for tonight,
Today's date is May 6th/7th

On UnNews today our headlines are:
*Collection Synchronizations Expands Secure Donut Shredding Services
*Explosive Diarrhea epidemic sweeps Universe
*Mexico Declares "Seis De Mayo" a National Holiday
*New Guinea blamed for Tsunami panic in New Zealand
*Christian Chiropractors will crack for Jesus

Our highlighted article for tonight:
New Guinea blamed for tsunami panic in New Zealand
Tribes in New Guinea have been blamed for causing a prank Tsuanmi alert, after a tribesman blew a tremendous fart, whilst at a
party, measuring 7.8 on the Richter TAMBR. To exacerbate matters, the tribesman then phoned into the local news agency, warning of
an impeding disaster. The story was passed onto Fox, who, wired tapped by rivals CNN, had their scoop stolen. The two agencies 
then spent the next 5 hours squabling over who owned the story and consequently, wasted so much time that it finally occured to
them that nothing had happened
Fortunately, it was a false alarm even for those in NZ and nobody lost their heads.

Taking a look at other news sources now:
The Headlines are:
*British troops clash in Basra, Iraq over a crashed helicopter with locals
*Bush denies he squeezes out the Ex-CIA Chief
*The Anglican Church has again dodged the issue over Gay Bishops
*Brazil has gone nuclear
*UK Minister Tessa Jowel's husband, David Mills says he will clear his wife's name

Taking a look at the weather over tommorow:
*Its going to be sunny on the Pacific Coast
*Yet Sunny/Overcast on the East Coast
*And, of course, it will be raining in Liverpool tommorrow

That's all for now, I'm BarryC and that was the inaugral UnNews Bulletin.