Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/ UnNews:Bush had Sex and Didn't Realize it

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UnNews:Bush had Sex and Didn't Realize it

Please tell me how I can change this article to make it more satirical. Satire is something I fail at, so please help me out with that. Other than that, I do not believe that I will get any images for this article. Please tell me if you liked this article. --Razorflame 01:40, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

/me banishes punctuation Hey Razor sorry for yelling at you and I realize you're just trying to help let's get started --  Le Cejak • <-> 15:53, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

I am going to get a picture and insert it as soon as someone tells me how to.--Razorflame 16:03, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

Badda bing, take a look at the code. --  Le Cejak • <-> 16:06, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

Thanks dude. I owe ya one. I will look at the code very shortly :) --Razorflame 16:07, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

[[Image:Noise.jpg|thumb|right|200px|''Oh Jesus, RUN, BUSH IS TALKING ABOUT HIS SEX LIFE!'']] --  Le Cejak • <-> 16:08, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

Have already added it to my userpage as a reminder :) Also, could you take a look at: Most Haunted and help me out with my request at the bottom of the page? --Razorflame 16:10, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

Humour:	7	avg of all the paragraphs P1 (8) Yeah, that was pretty damn funny. However, it was random. Please reiterate why he didn't realize it or don't mention it as the opener joke (9 -1 for that) P2 (7) Adequate. A few suggestions: Get rid of every single "this" and restructure the paragraph to compensate for that. Get rid of the "in his mind" thing. Tell us what his superior said after he heard that his own men wouldn't go in. P3 (6) Short. Please expand with anything relating to what has already been said.
Concept:	6	It was only a nearly adequate idea for a few reasons: Bush jokes: everybody's tired of them. However, this puts a weird new spin on it. Short: You didn't have enough material! That's a problem. Here are some ideas: give statistics on this kind of thing happening. explain what Bush was talking about more.
Prose and formatting:	7	Fine, except that it's too damn short. In fact, each paragraph is too short, which makes it look funny.
Images:	0	no pictures! Not even a lame one of Bush at a podium!
Miscellaneous:	5	avg of your other scores
Final Score:	25	Keep trying on this one, and thank you for writing stuff! Come see me with comments If you had a pic of Bush at a podium, your score would go from 25 to 33.5. If you had a picture of people running in terror, your score would go from 33.5 to 36.
Reviewer:	Le Cejak • <-> 15:53, 7 November 2007 (UTC)