Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Wicca
Wicca[edit source]
Palewillow 18:02, November 12, 2010 (UTC)
| Humour: | 8 | Very funny. Sarcasm works well with wicca. I didn't quite get the Correllian Tradition, but I could be missing some reference there. The Gardner thing may also be a bit odd for people who don't know about him. You make good use of the whole 1954 thing, but maybe worth moving Gardner up to the history section? You could actually ditch the mexican gardener thing and get closer to the truth about Gardner and probably have it be quite funny. The bloke's mad enough as is. |
| Concept: | 7 | Simple concept but good. Surprised it wasn't done earlier. |
| Prose and formatting: | 7 | Good. Nice clean writing style. It does feel though that there's repetition in there. I wonder if the beliefs section would work better if it was more concise and perhaps broken up in to shorter sections. e.g. What to wear, what props you'll need, how do you share your wiccaness with the world. You could also move the "A typical Alexandrian Pagan." image down so it doesn't drastically precede the text it accompanies.
The Hanger On Tradition part is a nice idea, but I think it seems to be pretty much the same as Christian Wicca. Maybe worth changing it to "social wiccan" and paint it as something done by rational people who nonetheless enjoy being in the company of overweight women with funny names? I'm really not sure about the Christian Wicca part. It's worth having this in, but perhaps trim it down and include a Bible reference or two showing that mixing Wicca and Christianity is like mixing turpentine and milk? Exodus 22:18 "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." Leviticus 19:26 "...Do not practice divination or seek omens." Personally I'd make a big play on the inherent hypocrisy of thinking that Jesus would happily clap his holy hands as the wiccans do their magickal tricks for his entertainment. I'm rambling a bit, but I think this section could benefit from a rewrite. |
| Images: | 9 | Images are good, and the mushroom shitting caption made me laugh out loud. |
| Miscellaneous: | 9 | |
| Final Score: | 40 | Pretty good article. I think though it would benefit from being a bit shorter. There are recurring themes that could be merged together. |
| Reviewer: | Concernedresident 00:19, December 28, 2010 (UTC) | |