Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/HowTo:Survive a Baby (2nd review)
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HowTo:Survive a Baby [edit source]
I've been reviewed once without a score, I'd like to see a review by an established PEEING member preferably, or at the very least someone with kids of their own. *wink* I guess I'd like to see if my current improvements have done any good. 
16:32, 15 June 2009 (UTC)
- As an established PEEING member, I'll be happy to get to this later on. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 16:55, 15 June 2009 (UTC)
| Humour: | 5 | Well, there were some okay parts in this, but overall it really didn't make me laugh. I liked the "nasty business" section, that was probably the strong point of the article humor-wise, but otherwise, you're gonna need a little elbow grease. The first 2 sections, not counting the intro, because it's supposed to be short, are too short and need to be expanded on. Also, there really needs to be a basic idea, which there isn't. I'll get to that in the next section. |
| Concept: | 4 | One of my main concerns. When you take a simple concept, such as how to live with an infant, you have to take a second direction to form the basic concept. It seems you just took a bunch of subconcepts and combined them into the same article. Take a solid, definite concept and capitalize on it. If you look at any featured article, you'll notice they have one solid direction, and you need that if you want this to succeed in any way. |
| Prose and formatting: | 7 | Strong prose. I really don't have much advice here, except watch for left-out commas and use bolds and italics when needed, and take out the bold in the beginning. It's really ugly. |
| Images: | 3.5 | Wow. I'll score image by image here, like I've done before:
Also put one more on there. I believe you should always have at least three images, unless you're doing an UnPoetia or an UnTunes. |
| Miscellaneous: | 4.9 | used pee template |
| Final Score: | 24.4 | Make the changes I specified, and put it back up on Pee Review, and you will have a solid article. |
| Reviewer: | ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 20:42, 15 June 2009 (UTC) | |
Fly-by: You could use a few more images. It's kind of a wall of text, and is a little hard to read. Try replacing that second image with a photograph, such as the one from I maed a yuky doody. Saberwolf116 21:33, 15 June 2009 (UTC)