Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/September 19

The Doctor is a Time Lord from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation Superfluous. He is 903 years old,and serves in the capacities of saviour of lives and guardian of justice—as well as your host on the BBC1 documentary Doctor Who.

The Doctor was born between a Time Lord father and a genetic construction device "mother", on the planet Gallifrey. His father wanted him to be a doctor or a lawyer, and forced him to study at Gallifrey Medical University's citadel campus. However, he instead developed an interest in gadgetry and time travel, a paradoxically taboo subject amongst the Time Lords, and transferred to the Time Lord Academy. He built his own time-travelling TARDIS, which he gave away and then subsequently stole back. One day, he would be able to brag to inferior beings that he built the TARDIS, and subsequently confuse them by also saying that he stole it.

Just then, the Daleks, then a peaceful race of exterminators, went to war with the Time Lords, due to a horrible misunderstanding of the word "Time Lord," which in fact meant "termite" in the Dalek language. The Doctor escaped with his TARDIS, and he landed on Earth, specifically London, New Year's Day, 1963, and adopted Susan Foreman as his granddaughter, taking her last name to form his false Earth identity, "Doctor Foreman." At this point, the TARDIS became stuck in the shape of a police box. (Full article...)