Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/October 1

WASHINGTON, D.C.--A startling discovery was made today, as contractors hired to give the White House a fresh coat of paint inspected the building. They found that the color the White House is currently painted in is actually a subtle shade of off-white, instead of white, which the name "White House" typically implies. This oddity has caused an outbreak of campaigns to change anything from the color of the great house, to the name of the great house. One group even suggests that the White House be destroyed. "Burn the truth! Burn the TRUTH!!!", one supporter said. Currently there are several opinions on what needs to be done.

Many people feel that the White House should be repainted white. Actual white, not off-white. Most people feel this is the right thing to do, as the White House is traditionally thought of as being, well, white. Giving the White House a fresh coat of paint is also the popular opinion of KKK. "If the White House is not repainted white, it will not show white supremacy in the White House. That would be bad, especially with Barack Obama running for president.", says KKK activist Bobby-Joe Hicksby.

On the other side of the argument, however, is the NAACP. They agree the White House needs to repainted. This group, however, believes it should be painted black. "The White House really needs to be painted black, to represent all the races. (Awkward Pause) Especially the blacks.", says NAACP spokesperson Joe Brown. Of course, this would mean renaming it the "Black House". Says Richard Sleven, "The black house? Sounds like a porno I saw once." (Full article...)