Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/November 1

Paul Jackson "Pollon" Pollock (January 28, 1912 – August 11, 1956) was a world-renowned American painter, famous for his unique technique of uncontrolled dribbling, known to masters of the trade as the "My four year old could do that" method.

Pollock was extremely influential in the development of "smmatternist" art, which is part of the general madernist movement away from drawing actual giraffes and towards making randomly colored puddles that represent Giraffes torn asunder by the immense gravity of a neutron star, dripped in green and red paint, which was actually one of Pollock's more well-known pieces. For this sort of meta-artistry, Pollock is rightfully considered to be many things, none of which are good or respectable.

Later in life Pollock extended his Smmatternist dabbling into various other fields. The farmers who own these fields promptly told Mr. Pollock to exit their fields, which he did with little incident or fanfare. (Full article...)