Uncyclopedia:Featured articles/January 29

You’ve seen it on Oprah. You vaguely remember seeing it on a map somewhere when you were ten. You might have even seen it in awful crocodile-themed films produced in the eighties. So why not see it with your own eyes? Release the shackles of the nine-to-five rat race and take a trip down under, or if you’re stationed on the Antarctic base, up over, or if you’re South American, due west. How about you just head in whichever colloquially-named compass bearing that applies to your nation of residence and come on down to Australia. Or is that come on left? Nevermind.

Due its considerably large geographical area and relative abundance of nothingness, not to mention the various poisonous marsupials, reptiles, mammals and plants, it is advised that international tourists develop a clear itinerary. By doing this, your holiday will be efficient and cheap, and you’ll avoid a fate worse than death: getting lost in the Outback with no food or water. Or even worse — getting stuck in Adelaide. (Full article...)