UnTweets:A Mafia boss's tale
Name: Donald Soprano
Location: None of your goddamn business
Bio: I run a perfectly legitimate supermarket chain, which is the only reason that I'm filthy stinking rich.
Following 240.
Followers 300.
dsoprano
Oh, hello twitterverse! My name is Donald Soprano, owner of the Fantisimo supermarket chain!
14:45 23 June 2011 from web
Yeah, I mean we got a lot of good stuff on sale right here! Just got a new batch of Skippy's peanut butter jars!
14:48, 23 June 2011 from web
Thank you people for all the generous purchases you make! You customers are what my business is all about!
12:00, 24 June 2011 from web
@lsoprano Hahaha, honey! Hope you're enjoying your stay in the Bahamas! #Imissyou
15:23, 24 June 2011 from web
Great. Fucking Feds decided to raid the Manhattan branch again. Wonder what went wrong this time! #justmyluck
14:21, 28 June 2011 from web
How many times do I have to tell these guys I'm not trafficking heroin through my supermarket chains! They just keep coming and coming...
14:25, 28 June 2011 from web
To my followers- don't listen to a damn thing these putas tell you! My business is legit! I have nothing to do with narcotics!
14:45, 28 June 2011 from web
@carlmorgan This is the third time this month!
14:47, 28 June 2011 from web
@nizamj Of course they would do that! These vultures just don't spare anybody!!
14:47, 28 June 2011 from web
RT @nizamj I feel you man! Those morons raided my kebab stand and arrested me just because I was Muslim!
14:50, 28 June 2011 from web
Phew! Everything's cooled down, now. They didn't find anything "concrete". Big surprise. LOL.
20:34, 28 June 2011 from web
It isn't easy running a business in this country. Guess being the son of a Sicilian immigrant does have its baggage.
21:00, 28 June 2011 from web
@joefontane No, my father does not know any Don Corleone. He's never even been to the village of Corleone!
21:37, 28 June 2011 from web
@joefontane However, I do know a Brian Corleone. He runs the Romano resort in Vegas. Follow him everybody! (@briancorleone)
21:38, 28 June 2011 from web
Phew! Back to business as usual today! Good thing the raid didn't affect the business at the Manhattan chain in any way!
12:56, 29 June 2011 from web
That stupid Harley Mason still hasn't repaid the loan he took from me!
18:34, 29 June 2011 from web
It's his loss. At this rate, I don't even know if he'll be able to afford all the interest that he's accumulated!
18:34, 29 June 2011 from web
Great. Harley still isn't returning my calls. Maybe I should pay him a visit with some of my friends.
20:00, 29 June 2011 from web
Just had a nice chat with him and his family. Promises to repay the money tomorrow.
21:00, 29 June 2011 from web
@carlmorgan Oh, I just asked him what was taking him so long. Apparently, he's got quite a family to take care of.
21:03, 29 June 2011 from web
@carlmorgan Yeah, he's got kids, grandparents, great-grandparents, all under one roof. That's a lot of people!
21:03, 29 June 2011 from web
@carlmorgan That's right. He pays up by tomorrow, and I provide financial assistance to his family. It's a win-win!
21:04, 29 June 2011 from web
Sorry for not tweeting for a while my friends, been really busy dealing with the competition to my supermarket chain.
17:45, 10 July 2011 from web
@nizamj Yeah, some rival chains had set up shop in the joint. But they won't be bothering you with their substandard products anymore!
17:47, 10 July 2011 from web
@nizamj Sure we could sell your products at our market! I'm pretty sure the customers would love your ready-to-eat kebab rolls.
17:50, 10 July 2011 from web
@nizamj You're very much welcome. You be my friend and I'll be yours! It's the way of the world!
17:50, 10 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Hey there pal! Been a long time since we chatted!
14:44, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Why haven't you called? Told me how business was going..
14:44, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone The casino must be undergoing expansion, eh?
14:45, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Fuck! Those putas tried to get a search warrant?
14:46, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Has the law-enforcement in this country lost its mind?
14:47, 13 July, 2011 from web
@briancorleone The losers didn't find anything, eh? Big surprise.
14:48, 13 July, 2011 from web
@briancorleone Crack? They though you were running a crack lab? That's seriously messed up!
14:50, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Not to be too patronizing, but you should have clocked that asshole right in the face!
14:51, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Arrived at noon, in broad daylight? These people are so inconsiderate!
14:57, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Yet they keep hounding us like mongrels! What the hell is wrong with them? WHAT?
14:57, 13 July 2011 from web
@briancorleone Ah, I see. Be sure to send over those products by next week, okay?
15:38, 13 July 2011 from web
@carlmorgan Oh, didn't I tell you? Brian helps me handle the shipping of consumer goods from state to state. You know, because I have supermarkets all over the place.
15:45, 13 July 2011 from web
@carlmorgan @briancorleone also owns a trucking business, you see. I'm often in need of his services.
15:54, 13 July 2011 from web