UnPoetia:The Pwning of the N00bs

Poetry for people who hate poetry

I.

On a rocky ridge of a wind-worn field,

A 1337 haxxor told a n00b to yield.

But met with a response he nary liked,

He believed necessary a fight.

He primed his horses, packed his food,

And thus began the pwning of the n00bs.

II.

At each end of that damned plain,

One of death and one of pain.

The 1337est haxxor of them all

Sounded the eerie battle call.

'LOL' he proclaimed 'I shall ROFL when he is dead

And in a chatroom post his head!'

III.

With wary eye and pale face,

The defenceless n00bs awaited their fate.

'We've g2g as fast as we can,

And flee from the grip of this tainted land.

Xp is the one thing that has belied us

Ever since 1337ness hath denied us.'

IV.

The haxxors charged forward, like manifestations from hell,

When all that came from the n00bs were whimpering yells.

They were attacked with swords that gleamed,

The death-ridden field was a cacophany of screams.

V.

The pwned n00bs fell, score by score,

Death swooped upon them like a Japanese whore.

But just as the haxxors had turned into murderous thugs,

Their internet servers began to chug.

VI.

The n00bs seized their lucky chance,

And without a backward glance,

Charged towards the helpless 1337s

With evil, heart-wrenching shrieks.

VII.

The battle did never halt,

Neither sides letting slip a fault.

Bit chugging servers or not,

It's victory the haxxors finally got.

VIII.

Although many years have passed since the day,

Memories have stayed the same,

And from our minds shall never move

The tale of the pwning of the n00bs. There will be pwn