UnNews:Unidentified gang of birds "may have" been involved in hit-and-run with small plane
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This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation. |
15 January 2009
Reports have come in indicating that earlier today, a flock of birds flying above the Hudson River may have been struck by an airplane, which then immediately left the midair scene without stopping to check the condition of the aerial motor victims. This is the latest in a line of hit-and-runs by aircraft in the gang warfare between man and bird over control of the skies of North America.
Reports are sketchy over the specific faction, or "species", of Avians to which the victims belonged, though some have conjectured that the target was once again the Geese clan.
The criminal was chased down by the forces of gravity, a longtime ally of the birds. It was quickly apprehended by watercraft belonging to humans, and the birds are already demanding that the criminal be turned over to be tried for its crime.
The status of the injured Avians are unknown, as with most gang crime, and police both human and Avian are offering rewards for anyone with information about the crime.
Sources[edit | edit source]
- AP "US Airways plane goes down in Hudson River" ', January 15, 2009
- James Macpherson "NTSB: University plane crashed after hitting goose" ', January 2, 2009