UnNews:Man wins award for "Best Suicide Of The Year"

This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.

30 March 2008

AUSTRAILIA, Australia -- A 81 year old man has been awarded "Best Suicide Of The Year" for designing and building a robot, whose main purpose was to assist in his suicide. Obviously hanging has gone completely out of style.

The man, who had been under pressure from his relatives to "sling" his proverbial "hook", struggling with life alone and obviously completely mad, feeling that his life had lost all happiness and meaning, turned to what can only be said to be the Hornby form of Euthanasia.

And it's not at all completely over the top. No sir.

The robot, who fucked off immediately after realising that being a suicide robot and being around a man who recently committed suicide wasn't a great idea, is missing, premused following Paul Gascoigne. I think that would be better for everyone, no?

• I mean really. "'Really.'" Fucking Hell., March 30, 2008