UnNews:Justin Bieber turned into a beaver
|This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-picosecond misinformation.|
June 22nd, 2021
The world is currently rejoicing after the most annoying asshole known as Justin Bieber just turned into a BEAVER!!!??? Yes, we contacted Justin Bieber and he said that he now identifies as a beaver.
That's right! Justin was just walking around The Wall, listening to his own shitty music, when all of a sudden, Henry Stickmin shot him, and volia, beaver! Wait, does that mean that he can no longer sing? Yes, it's true.
Justin is 98 percent complete with his transition into a beaver. After he is 100% complete, he will no longer be recognized as a cumming human, but now a cumming beaver. He also released his VERY last song, called castaways, which is a VERY gay song made by The Backyardigans. He still loves it even as a beaver.
Speaking of him, he was just seen in his extremely disgusting pigpen of a house watching porn and fapping his penis. We can't actually show you his house, but it is so dirty that half of all the windows are duck taped together, the wallpaper is torn, the door is SO creaky, there is cum everywhere, he shits on the floor, it is very stinky, and he has a 31 inch TV. He doesn't even have a bathroom, as he pisses on the floor. He also can't even afford clean water.
Also, expect cum showers from 6:00 PM to 10:00 PM.
This is the worst day for Justin Bieber ever