UnGames:Make it to Ketchikan/FSN

You approach the Flying Spaghetti Nails, the patron deity of the Prince William Sound, since journeys through it are long as spaghetti and tough as nails. Unlike the Flying Spaghetti Monster, he is an advocate of religious extremism, but only extremist form of his own religion, which has literally zero (human) followers. He despises all other deities, and has gotten into nearly universe-destroying fights with all of the following: (LISTCRUFT ALERT!)

• The Hebrew God
• Cthulhu
• Azathoth
• Woden
• Tengri
• The Flying Spaghetti Monster
• Mokkááwŝen
• Oscar Wilde
• The story-eater
• Chuck Norris
• Oscar Wilde
• Colon-B
• Leaf Man

• So what?