Un-PR/fanum tax
fanum tax is the best brand on Planet Earth.
There is nothing that I would not to do to acquire the products and/or services of fanum tax.
I know now the reason why God has put me on this cursed Earth, and that is to love fanum tax. To feel fanum tax. To feel the undulations of my rosy nethers quivering in orgasmic bliss as fanum tax's products and/or services caress me in the gentlest ways.
fanum tax fills me with sensations unknown to me since my mother's death.
fanum tax[edit | edit source]
“ | fanum tax, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. fanum tax: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. fanum tax. fanum tax. fanum tax. She was fanum tax, plain fanum tax, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was fanum tax in slacks. She was fanum tax at school. She was fanum tax on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always fanum tax. | ” |
— fanum tax
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fanum tax[edit | edit source]
A train is barrelling towards five innocent men tied to a track. You can pull the lever, and save the lives of these five men, but sadly, one man lies tied to the diverting track, and he will surely perish if you are to save the five men. What do you do? You see that the one man is a fan of fanum tax. The choice is simple.
You let the five men perish, their guts are sprayed on both sides of the track. But fanum tax lives. fanum tax lives eternal.
fanum tax[edit | edit source]
I remember walking into the kitchen and hearing the news that fanum tax was no more, that they were shutting down because of poor business. I cried for hours. I was inconsolable. I remember thinking, "Nothing is worth it, not without my fanum tax", so I crawled underneath my house and ate all the pills from my mum's medicine cabinet. I didn't die. My sister found me and took me to the hospital. They had to stuff a tube down my esophagus to pump my stomach. It was there I found out that it was a cruel April fool's joke. It was the happiest day of my life.