Thirty Five Noodles

Thirty Five Noodles
Leung and Noodle performing in Berlin, German Reich, 2022.
Background information
Origin	Aşgabatgrad, South Turkmen National Republic
Genres	Alternative rock Electropop Alternative hip hop Pop rap Indie pop Pop rock
Years active	2005–present
Labels	South Turkmen Records
Members	Eleanor Noodle Jack Leung
Past members	James G

Thirty Five Noodles is a South Turkmen alternative rock duo formed in 2005 by Eleanor Noodle and Jack Leung. The group are known for their incoherent interviews, self-published lawsuits, and album covers that frequently feature people who did not consent to being on them. They achieved cult status in 2006 with the controversial single Thomas, a song that scholars have described as “a cry for help disguised as rock music.”

History

The band formed in a convenience store queue in Asbatgrad after Noodle accidentally dropped a packet of instant noodles on Leung’s foot. The incident inspired the name and a lifelong argument over who technically owns the “five” in it.

Their early work was recorded entirely on a malfunctioning karaoke machine borrowed from a relative. When the machine caught fire during mixing, Leung allegedly said, “That’s the best sound we’ve ever made.”

After several independent releases, the duo signed with South Turkmen Records, who reportedly mistook them for an art project. Their first album, Spoon Economics, sold poorly but was praised in a local newspaper column titled “Music We Found in the Bin.”

Musical style

Thirty Five Noodles describe their sound as “post-coherent experimental reality pop.” Reviewers, however, have compared it to “being stuck inside a blender made of enthusiasm.” The band regularly switches instruments mid-song, once swapping roles five times during a three-minute track.

Their lyrics often explore themes of confusion, regret, and breakfast. Leung writes most of them while Noodle “translates them into human.”

Lawsuits

The group has been involved in multiple legal battles. In 2015, they filed a lawsuit against Twenty One Pilots, accusing the band of “stealing our exact idea of being two people.” The case was dismissed when the judge declared, “I refuse to set a precedent for this nonsense.”

They also briefly attempted to sue South Turkmen Records for “not believing in us enough,” but dropped the case after realizing they were still under contract.

Controversies

Thirty Five Noodles have been described as “walking PR disasters wearing microphones.”

Unauthorized album covers

Almost every album the duo has released features a random person’s face, often photographed without consent. The 2009 record Music for People Who Dislike Music infamously used an image of a postal worker yawning, taken through a café window. When the man sued, Leung argued the photo was “a metaphor for public service,” while Noodle added that “his expression captured the spirit of the album: deep regret.”

The 2020 album Noodle Nation went further, showing twelve strangers mid-bite in a restaurant. According to the band, they “didn’t know they were in the picture, which makes it real.” The case was settled after the duo agreed to send everyone a free CD, which none of the plaintiffs accepted.

The blender incident

In 2013, the group appeared on a South Turkmen morning show to demonstrate “sound innovation.” The demonstration involved plugging a blender into an amplifier, which promptly exploded and knocked out power to three city blocks. Noodle later claimed it was “an artistic blackout.”

The festival ban

During the 2017 “Sunburst Music Gathering,” Thirty Five Noodles were banned from performing after replacing their scheduled set with a 45-minute slideshow of vegetables. The duo defended it as “a statement on modern appetite.”

The Asbatgrad apology tour

In 2021, following a series of poorly received public comments about “not believing in melody,” the band embarked on an apology tour that mostly consisted of showing up unannounced to other artists’ gigs and saying sorry between songs. This confused audiences, but ticket sales for the *other* bands increased dramatically.

Departure of James G

Former member James G was removed from Thirty Five Noodles in 2007 after what insiders refer to as “The Incident at the rehearsal basement.” Accounts vary, but most agree it began when James attempted to replace all lyrics with a live reading of his unfinished manifesto “Music Is a Lie (And So Are You).”

When Noodle refused to participate, James reportedly unplugged her microphone, declared himself “the only real sound,” and began screaming scales for forty minutes. Leung described the scene as “avant-garde terrorism.”

Things worsened after James tried to rebrand the group as “The Thirty-Five Noodles Featuring James.” Promotional posters appeared overnight, all bearing his face crudely photoshopped over Leung’s. The final straw came when he attempted to hold a solo concert in the same venue, one hour before the actual band’s performance, using their equipment and a cardboard cutout of Noodle.

He was officially kicked out the following day when South Turkmen Records filed a restraining order against him “for being too experimental in public.” In later interviews, Leung summarized the ordeal simply:

“James didn’t leave the band — the band left him, emotionally, spiritually, and legally.”

Rumours and myths

A long-standing rumour claims a scratched cassette of Thomas was once mistaken by intelligence analysts for a coded message. Agents reportedly spent weeks trying to decrypt the line “Thomas, Thomas, come on me,” before determining it was “just nonsense.”

Another rumour suggests the duo once received fan mail signed “Bin L.,” which tabloids linked to an infamous historical figure. Leung later admitted he wrote the letter himself “to make us look mysterious,” adding, “it worked — for about three minutes.”

Public image

Noodle and Leung are famous for their unfiltered interviews, often answering serious questions with recipes or unrelated anecdotes. Their fashion sense mixes formalwear and confusion; one journalist described their look as “scientists who got lost on the way to a nightclub.”

Despite being banned from several local venues, the pair maintain a loyal fanbase of people who “aren’t sure if it’s good but can’t look away.”

Legacy

Though rarely taken seriously, Thirty Five Noodles have become a cornerstone of South Turkmen’s underground music scene. Their work is studied by media students under modules like “Authentic Failure in Post-Irony Culture.” A 2024 documentary, Still Cooking: The Noodles Story, premiered to critical uncertainty and a standing shrug.

The band’s motto remains: “If it makes sense, delete it.”

Discography

• Spoon Economics (2005)
• Thomas (2006)
• Music for People Who Dislike Music (2009)
• Live in Silence (Unintentional) (2012)
• Noodle Nation (2020)
• Thirty Five Noodles vs. the Legal System (2023)

See also

• Thomas (song)