Talk:Zeno of Elea

Zeno's paradox as presented here is Zeno's paradox in reality. This page is factual. 72.136.134.163 00:23, 23 June 2006 (UTC)

It may actually be Zeno's Paradox, however it is presented in a satirical manner. Some non-factual items include:

- Zeno was born on August 47th.

- Jesus Christ was Zeno's father.

- Mary Magdalene was Zeno's mother.

- Helen of Troy was Zeno's niece.

- Socrates was Zeno's great grandfather.

- The acceptance of Zeno's Paradox means the acceptance of the impossiblity of life.

- All Catholic priests are homosexuals.

- October 13th 475 B.C. took place on a Friday.

- Pagans perform rituals involving cutting their hearts out and replacing them with pigs hearts.

- Zeno was awarded four Nobel Prizes for his Paradox Theory.

- Denial of Zeno's Paradox is conclusive evidence that it is false.

- "Points" are only relevant to two-dimensional planes.

- It is possible for something which is impossible to be possible.

- Alfred Nobel founded the Nobel Prize Association of America and Other Lesser Countries.

- There is a $2.5 million reward for information on the location of Zeno's burial.

Granted, there are some factual statements made in the article. Namely, Zeno's Paradox itself is presented in a factual manner. However, the article itself is most definitely not factual.

The Beginner's Guide/Purpose reads:

* "Uncyclopedia is an encyclopedia full of misinformation and utter lies."

We are not wikipedia, but that should already have been plainly obvious. Fact is discouraged, comedy is paramount. However, please note that the opposite of the truth is hardly ever funny. Funny > lies.

Some key points here read "fact is discouraged...the opposite of the truth is hardly ever funny. Funny > lies".

What I have tried to do here is take a rather silly notion that movement is impossible and write a humorous article about the Paradox Theory and it's father. If using Zeno's actual Paradox in writing my article instead of making up some stupid crap ("Try to be funny and not just stupid.", Beginner's Guide/Purpose) has upset or offended you, I apologize.

However, unless you intend to vandalize/rewrite my article, please hold further comments about how completely and utterly factual this entire page is (as you indicated when you said, "This page is factual", clearly implying every statement made in the article was 100% fact).

Thank you. Monkey 05 06 06:36, 23 June 2006 (UTC)