Red tape/Red tape (article)

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Red tape claims yet another victim.

Red tape is a somewhat recent addition to society. Much has been said about its origins, but only a few real facts are known. The first appearance of red tape in media records took place in 1924. A Portuguese boy found a strange piece of tape wrapped around a telegraph pole. He licked it and it tasted funny, so he ran home and told his parents. They immediately called the police. A special task force led the attack on the red tape, which resulted in its imprisonment. Sadly, the telegraph pole to which the red tape was attached didn't survive the attack. Since the incident, red tape has multiplied, currently appearing in most aspects of our society.

Origins[edit | edit source]

Due to its unknown origin, it's not possible to clearly specify what is red tape. However, several experiments have been made and some important discoveries were made:

  • Red tape is not blue tape.
  • Red tape is not red paper.
  • Red tape tastes funny when licked.
  • Reverse Engineering of red tape is strictly prohibited.
  • Red tape can only be destroyed by tape in the color of its photographic negative, but doing so would destroy the whole Universe as we know it, except for a 7-11.

Red tape can be used in a variety of situations, although not as well as red tape. Therefore, red tape has been deprecated over the years and has now been replaced with red tape.

The largest red tape industry of the world is located in Brussels, the capital of the European Union.

See also[edit | edit source]