View source for PlayStation 5

[[File:PS5.png|thumb|right|200px|PS5 digital edition. No, [[Lie|it's not a worthless, broken Wi-Fi router, despite its appearance]]. Smash it to find out! No refunds, either.]]
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'''PlayStation 5''' is defunct piece of nonsense good for paying exorbitant prices for and then smashing for fun. Therefore PlayStation 5 need go commit [[seppuku]]. [[PlayStation 6]] surpass it in excerrence and cruelty and everything else.
[[id:PlayStation5]]

==Nothing to see here==
Seriously, you kiddies (and 30-year-old babies still living in mama-san's basement) still here? [[shameless self promotion|Go play on PS6]]! The forever system! It's so much better than this hunk-o-junk! [[Sony]] [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Paid_editing_(essay) has pay me to come from Japan] to warn you guys scram from this forbidden article about-ah forbidden subject-

[[File:Despicable-me-agnes-please.gif|300px]]

''sigh'' Fine. I teach you about how failed this console really is! And don't be surplise if I start saying [[swearing|bad word]] eithah!

==The truth==
Okay, contrary to what you see, the awesome system you know as the PS5 is really PS6! The ''true'' PS5 was failed experiment in [[Virtual Reality]] gaming. Once hailed as-ah most awesomest innovation EVER during deveropment, test subjects went crazy because VR rook and sound so real, cause them jump out of [[skyscrapers|tarr building]] thinking they [[Spider-Man]] and go splat, jump in front of highway vehicles thinking they [[John_Madden#Videogame_Series|American foot-a-ball playa]], not knowing they're not in [[reality|rear life]]! Playing against 18-wheerer truck thinking they running from sumo wrestler or whatever fatty American foot-a-barr prayer instead no funny! Many test subject dead from get smash by a truck! 

Knowing consequences, Sony no want get sued by sue-happy American customer! Therefore, development on VR Pray-Stationg 5 discontinued by Sony. VR game system no cheap to deverop, you know?? Also, stupid [[Mark Zuckerberg]] still make [[wp:Quest 2|Ocurus Quest]] for [[Facebook|Meta]], rook where it got em. PS6 then get develop, now best PlayStation ever! That system get sold as PS5, ''real'' PS5 is failure! Go! Scram! Go buy PS6!

==More truth. The Covid truth==
[[File:PS5 Space heater.jpeg|thumb|right|200px|[[Duct tape|"Refurbished"]] PS5 with Blu-Ray drive. No, it's not a space heater, and it's only $1,000 on [[eBay]], compared to the normal price of $1,000,000,000,000!]]
Stirr here? Okay, I terr you kids one last story about what happens with good marketing in shit situation.

Due to [[COVID-19|Chinese conspiracy for-ah bankrupt Japan that affect whole world as werr]], Sony no have game deveroper in rabs, prus China no have worker in factoly. All Sony have is tons of PlayStation 5 VR failure just sitting around in factory! Marketing team come up with ''brilliant'' idea. Having kidnap marketing people from [[Apple Inc.|American fruit computer company]], Sony devise way to serr off useress PS5 shells just sitting in factoly, pump it up as best thing evar! Rittle did stupid customers know these so-call PS5 worse than repackaged PS4. It ritterally wi-fi box or space heater! Just with some unknown VR capabirity, dumbass customer no able turn on due to Sony lock it! Company lawyer also sneak in "no refunds" poricy into contlact, stupid dumbass customer also no read 99.9 percent of time, therefore unable to sue! Thererfore, 99.9 percent of custermer so angry, they <s>Falcon Punch</s> (oops, that [[Nintendo]] reference) go [[God of War]] [[Destroy|Ragnorok]] on worthless shell after paying millions of dollar for it! Sony still scam customer of money! [[HAHAHA]]!

Now go buy PS6, rittle kiddies. Seriousry, go steal parents credit card or {{w|Venmo}} account and pay so we can addict you to game forever.

==See also==
*[[NFT]]
*[[Piñata]]
*[[Windows 8]]

{{Game Consoles}}

[[Category:PlayStation (brand)]]
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