Mormocracy

Mormocracy is a form of government derived from the Greek roots "Mormo" meaning "Without logic or reason", and "Cracy" meaning "To rule or govern." It was thought to be a lost style of rule, until it was revived by a group called the Mormons in the 1800's, who took it as their name.

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History

The origins of this unique system stem from the first moments of human thinking. Unfortunately, it did not progress much further. It still retains many of the barbaric practices of earlier forms. For example, all state marriages must be performed inside a mysterious temple, which has yet to be breached by outsiders. There are many speculations as to the perverted blood rituals which take place here, but reports cannot be confirmed.

Kind of like the Kremlin, only more intimidating

Organization

All Mormocracies are headed by an authoritarian, overzealous autocrat, usually named Gordon B. Hinkley or some other old guy (can never be a woman) who will take over when the other old guy dies. While it is not necessarily required for one to change their name to Gordon B. Hinkley or even some other long-dead old person, most successors usually do as a way of carrying on the legacy of the former (or as a way of cheaply imitating the Catholic church). In most Mormocracies, having less than 8 children is illegal, and punishable by flogging until you are persuaded to endlessly procreate. A prime example of this would be Utah, which has enacted strict measures to prevent any population decline. This form of rule also exhibits some traits of American Democracy, but without any of the positives. A congress is generally present, but just like America, it shares the traits of widespread incompetence and a 99% incumbency rate. It is, however, generally accepted to be at least four times as racist as an average congress. Most are proud of this achievement. Mormacracies are also noted for their astonishing ethnic diversity; Utah, for example, is 99% Caucasian, with the remaining 1% of the population being classified as "Other". This simplistic system of racial division has been widely praised as a way of unifying members of the country, drastically reducing racial tension and insuring the average Mormon's feelings of superiority. The system is currently being considered in the Parliaments of such progressive nations as Finland, Sweden, and Iran.

All glory to the Hypno Hinckley!

Propaganda

Mormocracies are widely accepted as having some of the most effective propaganda techniques ever conceived. Using them, they have managed to infiltrate American government. Some prime examples include Harry Reid and presidential candidate Mitt Romney. Citizens of Mormocracies hold very strong political views, however, they are unsure why. Most are quite honest and state they think the way they do simply because the Church/Government (or Churcherment as it is sometimes called.) told them to. Subliminal messaging is not necessary due to the high suggestibility of the average Mormocratic citizen.

Fun Facts

• Since the abolition of prohibition, alcohol and cigarette taxes have climbed ever higher. It is the goal of most Moromocracies to make alcohol as rare as diamonds. Which is why Brigham Young opened the first brewery in Utah!

• No business establishments are open on Family Home Evening,the Churcherment's most sacred holiday.

• Consequentley, most Mormocratic economies suffer greatly.

• Mormocratic constitutions can be revised as needed, just like their Bible (which they call the Book of Mormon.) Government Mormons