Lynn

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Lynn's looking at you!

“A real prospect for any 'up and coming' young monarch”

~ David Starsky on Lynn's Royal credentials

Lynn. Everyone likes her. So fat, so beautiful, and her armpit... so elegant! Who doesn't like her? Known as the Goddess of Fat, Lynn has made a name for herself by showing off her beautiful armpits and her hairy... well, hair. Lynn has attracted many admirers from all over the world, all eager to view her scenic armpits. Lynn has rejected most of the admirers, most of them being little short and stubby men. Lynn is very choosy, so most likely she wouldn't choose you. (Don't cry, please don't!)

Lynn was supposedly the goddess of fat, but when a man sees her, he falls down in love and amazement. Of course, it's how slim she is that makes him know that she is not fat at all.

So, what's so good about her armpits?[edit | edit source]

Lynn showing off her beautiful armpits.

Erm... Nobody (I mean everybody) actually knows why her armpit is continuously admired by several thousand lunatics, but it there have been rumors that it was because she bribed them with money. Of course, that isn't true. Lynn has great Charm and Charisma and well, has great Charm and Charisma. Simply amazing.

Time and time again, she has captivated the eyes of many a man. Lynn effectively uses her fresh Body Odor to hypnotize men (and women) to do her bidding. Which is usually dying. After all, Lynn has only lived a few million years - not enough to see some nice deaths. You know, gruesome, greek, like yours... Just like yours, anyway.

Lynn has also been known to be in collaborations with criminal masterminds like Willy on Wheels to massacre the online community, and take off their nerdy spectacles and go to her. For some reason, the online community were discovered to be immune. Must be those superpowers they downloaded from Uncyclopedia.

Anything else good about her?[edit | edit source]

Well, of course! Her head is perfect for putting a crown on. Lynn allegedly said that she preferred wearing thorny crowns as it made her seem horny. Many critics over the world praised her beautifully shaped head that even people like Jimbo Wales stated that her head was perfect, "like a bumper car". Rumours were that an IP called 43.427.852.2 had a crush on her but Lynn hated Maths.

Lynn is also known for her strong sense of humor - she always likes to crack jokes, always quoting from Oscar Wilde. Apparently, Uncyclopedians are not attracted to that side of her as most of them were fed up with Oscar Wilde. They preferred his nose than his words.