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- You may be looking for Intelligent women and not even know it!
“Why can't a man be beautiful and intelligent at the same time? Because he'd be a dolphin.”
“You found me!”
Error 418: Intelligent men cannot be found!
The intelligent men you are looking for do not appear to be available at this time.
Your standards may be too high. Have you considered opting for a non-standards compliant edition? Other men include sane men and sexy men. Editions hybridizing options in pairs have recently entered production.
In case of an immediate need for an intelligent man, please try the following:
- Reload this page until intelligent men are available.
- Look in another country or at another website.
- Provide a female acquaintance with a convincing strap-on.
- Give up and settle for one that isn't completely demented.
- Go to the closest library and begin coughing, people should come to ssshhh you. One may be a man.
"Sane, sexy or smart, pick one: cause you're never going to see all three in a man!" - Oscar Wilde
WARNING! This article is designed to offend.
If you are not offended by it, please edit it so that you will be in the future. For an example of how to be offensive, see: War on Humor
Manly Men Stuff
Bonerism ♂ Booby prize ♂ Booby trap ♂ Brawny ♂ Bro Code ♂ Can I borrow 5 bucks? ♂ Castration ♂ Cock shock ♂ Erection ♂ Father issues ♂ Galactic bulge ♂ Guy Code ♂ Hetero ♂ History of Man ♂ International Rules Of Manhood ♂ Lawnmower-Humvee ♂ Limp Dick ♂ Lynx Cool Metal Shower Gel ♂ Male privilege ♂ Man ball ♂ Man flu ♂ Man scale ♂ Mancard ♂ Man's best friend ♂ Manscaping ♂ Mantuition ♂ Masculism ♂ Men's rights movement ♂ Morning wood ♂ Pant Scrunching ♂ Penile suppressor ♂ Penis Enlargement Techniques ♂ My Penis ♂ Penis ♂ Price check ♂ Puppy dog tail ♂ Rocky Mountain Oysters ♂ Rules of the Men's Room ♂ Semen ♂ Seven ages of man ♂ Snips, snails and puppy dog tails ♂ Straight ♂ Testicles ♂ Things Women Didn't Need To Know About Men ♂ What's it to you?
Events & Places:
A Day With My Son ♂ Avenge my death ♂ Bart Simpson is sleeping with your wife ♂ Battle of the Bulge in my Pants ♂ Bra removal ♂ Burning Man ♂ Conversations With My Father ♂ Dick-sucking contest ♂ Gramp's Insane Ramblings ♂ I assume it's my penis ♂ Isle of Man ♂ High school: an essay by an old lonely man in a retirement home ♂ Panty raid ♂ Pen Island ♂ Penis jousting ♂ Penis removal ♂ Rob A Bank With Your Penis ♂ SPA ♂ Strip club ♂ Take Your Son To Work Day ♂ Teabag everything that moves
HowTo:Be a Badass ♂ HowTo:Be A Dad ♂ HowTo:Be A Man ♂ HowTo:Be Macho ♂ HowTo:Become a wise old man ♂ HowTo:Fight the man ♂ HowTo:Find the Remote Control ♂ HowTo:Get a boner ♂ HowTo:Get Others to Do Your Work for You ♂ HowTo:Hold a Handbag Like a Man ♂ HowTo:Hug another man ♂ HowTo:Kick a man when he's down ♂ HowTo:Make a That's What She Said jokeHowTo:Make Breakfast Goo (For Men) ♂ HowTo:Stop Being a Nerd ♂ HowTo:Take It Easy, Man ♂ HowTo:Teach a six-legged lame man how to jump rope ♂ HowTo:Tell if your son is gay ♂ The Man: A Primer and Something of a Call to Action ♂ The Obese Man's Handbook ♂ UnBooks:A Story, About a Man, that Comes to an Eventual Conclusion ♂ UnBooks:The Old Man and LV ♂ UnPoetia:Antiphallus ♂ UnPoetia:I got hit with a bag of dicks just to prove a point ♂ UnPoetia:There once was a limerick... ♂ UnScripts:Man Struggles to Explain Anal Sex to Son ♂ UnScripts:Rain Man: The Musical ♂ UnScripts:The Best Man
Guides to Women:
Ex wife owners manual ♂ HowTo:Ask a girl out ♂ HowTo:Control Women ♂ HowTo:Date an Emo Girl ♂ HowTo:Find a girlfriend ♂ HowTo:Get Laid ♂ HowTo:Get Married ♂ HowTo:Hunt Interesting Exotic Dancer Conversation ♂ HowTo:Impress a Girl ♂ HowTo:Make girls like you ♂ HowTo:Make Girls Love You ♂ HowTo:Meet women ♂ HowTo:Pick Up a Nymphomaniac ♂ HowTo:Pick Up and Keep Women ♂ HowTo:Pick up chicks ♂ HowTo:Pick up female nerds ♂ HowTo:Run Away From Fat Ladies ♂ HowTo:Score a Chick ♂ HowTo:Stop Ugly Girls from Liking You ♂ HowTo:Survive a Girl Attack ♂ HowTo:Trick Women in 3 Easy Steps ♂ Picking up chicks ♂ The Useless Idiot's Guide to Girlfriends ♂ UnBooks:An 82 Year Old Woman Wants My Body! ♂ UnBooks:So, you woke up next to a hooker: a guide to general etiquette ♂ UnBooks:The Complete Idiot's Guide To Talking To Women ♂ UnBooks:The Idiot's Guide to Getting Your Own Back ♂ Wife OS ♂ Why?:You Will Never Have a Chance in Hell With Her
Men You Know:
A nice enough guy ♂ Army men ♂ Assquatch ♂ Biggus Dickus ♂ Bro ♂ Coors Light Presents: The American Man ♂ Creepy guy who lives across the street ♂ Dice Man ♂ Dirty Old Men ♂ Dude ♂ Emo Man ♂ Father ♂ First man on the sun ♂ G-Man ♂ Grandpa ♂ He-Man ♂ Husband ♂ Intelligent men ♂ Janitor Man ♂ Male ♂ Man Babies ♂ Man on the fire exit signs ♂ Metrosexual ♂ Old White Man ♂ Pac-Man ♂ Renaissance Man ♂ Rich guys who blow all their money on expensive whores ♂ Sir ♂ Sissy ♂ Some guy you've never heard of ♂ Swamp Adventure Amusement Park Ride Announcer Man ♂ That Guy ♂ The Man ♂ The Muffin Man ♂ The Music Man ♂ The old man down the street ♂ The Wolf Man ♂ This Guy ♂ TPS ♂ Weatherman ♂ What's-his-name off that thing ♂ Your Dad
Not Quite Men:
Boy ♂ Boy band ♂ Boy racer ♂ Boyfriend ♂ Ghetto White Boy Syndrome ♂ Joseph Stalin's Secret Jamaican Boys Fight Club Choir ♂ Little boy who lives down the street ♂ Marmite School for Boys and Young Gentlemen ♂ Pool Boy ♂ UnBooks:The Boy Who Cried Wolf ♂ UnPoetia:As a boy ♂ UnPoetia:Little Boy ♂ Vatican Boys Punishment Squad ♂ Virtual Boy ♂ Your Boyfriend
"Don't worry, you'll meet somebody," says girl ♂ American Penis Restrictions to Begin This Week ♂ Grown man hates Justin Bieber ♂ It's still not okay to Pull Your Penis out in Public ♂ Male ego reaches all time high, females counted in average penis size ♂ Man decides against going to work ♂ Man dies after having sex with his gun ♂ Man goes to work; wife fucks his neighbor ♂ Man wakes up ♂ Man wins Most Oblivious Human award ♂ Man's nipples fall right off ♂ Marble Hills - a bachelor haven ♂ New penis developer 'a success' ♂ Old Man to Rise Again ♂ Respected theologians call for return to wife beating ♂ Shirtless Drunk Man Creates Havoc ♂ Some guy does some stuff ♂ [more...]