Inglewood

A Maori standing in Inglewood's rich quarter

“God I hate Inglewood”

~ God on Inglewood

Inglewood is the single city in New Zealand that has power and houses. It is the size of 5 New Yorks put together and then minimized to the size of 1/9 of half a rugby field. Inglewood was under the rule of the mongolians utill the she-bitch Helen conquered it with her army of HDP(Hideous Deformed People). There was also a brief period when Inglewood was under the rule of the Sheep-Kings of Wellington, but they were defeated and Mongolian rule was restored in a rebellion led by DC. Inglewood was named after King Arthur III's brother, Jamie Coorhagen Tototuilta Co'hagzzard gorth'kourngth Na Killlllio Bildge isss. Inglewood is the current capital of New Zealand, and capital of the Maori religion of cannibalism.

History

Inglewood was founded in 1201 by the god-king of Jew Land to house his Mongolian Prisoners. Years later the Prisoners broke free and killed the half-demon jewish guards. The Mongolians renamed themselves the Maori, which means Bush People in mongolian. The Maori conquered the rest of New Zealand and renamed it New Mongolia, but Samoa had already taken the name and copy righted it so the maori rerenamed it New Zealand. Inglewood was made the capital of New Zealand and for years it prospered and became a haven for artists, poorness, unrich people, hideous deformed people and other ex-imprisoned mongolians. But when the Dark Horde of the Evil island kindom, England invaded, Inglewood was destroyed in a space battle between the Mongolian Flagship and the English BattleStar Destroyer. The Mongolian Flagship was destroyed but most of the crew survived and managed to board the battlestar and blow it up from the inside. The following explosion destroyed Inglewood, so it was really the inglewoodians who destroyed Inglewood. It took many years for the Maori to rebuild their ancestral capital.

Inglewood Heroes

The heroes of Inglewood are:

• King Arthur III: Defeated the Jewish Half-Demons ans founded Inglewood
• Lord Darakon XI: he stopped the invasion of the cheeky darkies from Bangladesh
• Oscar Wilde: where isn't he a hero
• Chuck Norris: he saved inglewood from Cyric the Mad, who tried to kill all the Maori
• Cyric the Mad: Tried to kill all the Maori
• DC: Led the Maori hordes and defeated the evil Sheep-Kings of Wellington
• Chairman Mao: Defeated the mighty nationalists
• Sakura the Cardcaptor: Caught the Cards
• Dakura 'Mighty Man' Jammison: Killed 401 cows to weaken the power of Emperor Ireland

Leadership

• The first leader of inglewood was King Arthur III, who led the Mongolian prisoners against the Jews and liberated Inglewood. He founded the New Zealand empire and Killed all the native Moas and Farmers.
• Arthur's son, Lord Daxter was the second leader of Inglewood, he didn't do anything good, infact he killed over half the inglewoodians by creating Cancer
• The third ruler of Inglewood was DC. DC led the fourth crusade against the evil sheep-kings of Wellington, liberating Inglewood from their rule. He was killed during the crusade, but it was still a success. Many Maori say that they still see DC wandering New Zealand, but what would they know, they're Maori
• The fourth leader of Inglewood was Genghis Khan who conquered most of china and some other lands and also ripped the limbs off 409 Jews when he was acting as Hitlers general,Himmler.
• The fifth leader of inglewood was Sakura the Cardcaptor, who caught the cards

Helen Clark, Queen of Inglewood

• The sixth and current leader of inglewood is Queen Helen Clark, who is a evil half-man, half-shark evil dictator from the depths of the place, and enemy of all Maori and Mongolians. She has ruled for a long time, she uses fear and evil man-birds to govern the empire. Will anyone stand up to her hagged, hunched, flabby man body and save Inglewood from he long, dark, shadow of a shadow?

Landmarks

• the first landmark anyone should see is the memorial to Cyric the Mad, it is a mass grave filled with fresh dead Maori everyday
• another great landmark is the hole, its a hole that goes down about 4 feet. No one knows why this is a landmark
• the most famous landmark is the palace of Queen Helen, its a dark forboding castle constructed in 1372 by the Queen Herself.
• a landmark every young one should see is the powerstation, its the only one in New Zealand
• the temple of Genghis Khan
• the school of doom. This school was founed by Queen Helen herself and has since been the death of over 901 children
• the FPS Room. This room was built by FPS fans who don't have a RL
• those toilets with The Simpsons on them
• the statue of that guy with the gun