Engelbert Humperdinck
Engelbert "Bert" Humperdinck (born Arnold George Patel; May 2, 1936, in Madras, India) is a well-known British-American pop singer who rose to international fame in 1967 with the hit single "Bombtrack", which was later covered in 1994 by the polka/skiffle band Rage Against The Machine. He later embarked on a ludicrous solo career, releasing more hits such as "Never gonna give you up" (ft. Ludwig van Beethoven and Julius Caesar) and "Moravian Rhapsody" (ft. Jesus, Chuck Norris and Attila the Hun).
Early years[edit | edit source]
Bert was the last of several children born to British Army officer Sir Popeye Humperdinck and his wife Olive (nee Oyl). The family migrated to Leicester, England, when Bert was ten in search of the biggest knickers in the land. A year later they found him in them.
By the early 1950s Bert had taken the giant knickers on a global tour and was playing in nightclubs the world over. He's believed or not to have tried wearing his famous knickers until he was seventeen, when friends coaxed him into them by using a bag of pork scratchings.
Career[edit | edit source]
Bert's budding career was interrupted when he got called up to play at Wimbledon during the great tennis player famine of the mid-1950s, but he got his first chance to record in 1958, when Chaka Demus from the musical duo Chaka Demus & Pliers gave him a chance. His first single, "Fuck The Pain Away", was anything but a hit.
Bert went back to working the clubs with his amazing knickers until the mid 60's, when he decided to go it alone, stupidly dropping the fantastic knickers from his act; this was of course a failure and left him with little success – until 1966 when he and Chaka Demus would reunite with far different results from their previous attempts, and history was made.
Bribery charges[edit | edit source]
In 1968 an unfortunate incident revolving around a milkshake bar in East Anglia led to Bert's being charged with attempted bribery of a milkshake bar‑owner. He still refuses to admit it ever happened and now denies the existence of milkshakes – nd milk – and Anglia in its entirety.
Discography[edit | edit source]
| Year | Song Title | Chart Position |
|---|---|---|
| 1958 | Fuck The Pain Away | 218 |
| 1959 | Fuck The Pain Away (Re-Release) | 372 |
| 1959 | Fuck The Pain Away (Remix) | 598 |
| 1960 | Fuck The Pain Away (2nd Re-Release) | 1,643 |
| 1967 | Bombtrack | 1 |
| 1968 | Bombtrack (Re-Release) | 1 |
| 1968 | Bombtrack (Remix) | 1 |
| 1968 | Bombtrack (2nd Re-Release) | 1 |
| 1969 | Bombtrack (Samba Version) | 1 |
| 1969 | Bombtrack (Live & Unplugged) | 1 |
| 1969 | Bombtrack (Instumental) | 1 |
| 1969 | Bombtrack (Including Bonus Track "Fuck the Pain Away") | 2,749 |
| 1970 | Bombtrack (3rd Re-Release) | 1 |