Emergency Alert System
The Emergency Alert System, also abbreviated as EAS, is a method of scaring people into taking shelter and/or evacuating certain areas. Luckily, only North America uses the true EAS, and the rest of the world is safe... Or is it?
So, what is the EAS, exactly?[edit | edit source]
The EAS is meant to alert American residents of either natural disasters like these, or it is used to deliver an urgent civil message, but most of the time it's just a natural disaster.
What kind of alerts do the EAS send off?[edit | edit source]
Here's a list of all the known alerts aired by the EAS:
Required Weekly Test[edit | edit source]
Least scariest alert. It's just a test, as there is no actual threat
Tornado Watch[edit | edit source]
This alert doesn't mean a tornado's coming, but the conditions are right for one to form, so NOAA will keep an eye on that area so they can send off the scare buzzer as soon as one forms.
Tornado Warning[edit | edit source]
This alert means a twister has formed in your area. This may be accompanied by loud and annoying sirens.
Earthquake Warning[edit | edit source]
This alert means seismic activity is occurring in a fault line near you.
Shelter In Place Warning[edit | edit source]
This alert means that you shouldn't evacuate, but rather take shelter in your own home
Civil Danger Warning[edit | edit source]
This alert is one of 3 that you always see in those "EAS scenarios". It means that there is something that, well, poses a threat to the city.
Civil Emergency Message[edit | edit source]
Quite similar to the civil danger warning, it means something very similar.
Emergency Action Notification[edit | edit source]
This alert notifies you about an emergency, it's pretty self-explanatory.
Sodomy Alert[edit | edit source]
This alert informs you on an event involving sodomy.
Spell-like-a-child Advisory[edit | edit source]
This alert tells you to spell like a child, it's pretty self explanatory.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA[edit | edit source]
Oh no, here it co- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA -GreyShirtDudeAtSchool (talk) 14:20, 23 November 2020 (UTC) Anyways, an AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA warns you if people in your area are spontaneously (and constantly) screaming for no reason.
Local Area Emergency[edit | edit source]
This alert... Uhmmmm... What purpose does this alert serve? The civil emergency message is better.
EAS "Scenarios"[edit | edit source]
EAS Scenarios are basically, what if this were to happen, expressed in emergency alerts?
Lots of them contain valid SAME headers, and also warns you that playing them in public or on air could trigger the EAS legitimately. The warning is mostly a reason to get the cops off your back if some bimbo plays the EAS on air or in public.