Tacoman

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Tacoman

Tacoman.JPG
Tacoman in his first appearance.

Publisher None
First appearance After defending a taquitaria in Boston.
Created by This Guy
Statistics
Real name Pedro Taquinse
Status Missing, presumed fed
Affiliations The Council of Food
Previous affiliations None
Notable aliases Burrito Boy
Notable relatives Adopted parents - The Wonder Twins
Notable powers See Below.

Tacoman is the superhero for the new generation of humans. Namely, the illegal immigrant generation. Anyway, Tacoman is a powerful superhero with many different... er... powers. Cool.

Tacoman's Origins[edit | edit source]

Tacoman was found as a child by The Wonder Twins in a gigantic burrito in the bat-infested sewer systems of Chipotle City. He was adopted by the two totally useless superheroes, and grew up leading a normal life under the name Pedro Taquinse (despite being white). However, when in high school, he discovered one day in the cafeteria that he had the ability to create tacos out of thin air. He quickly set up a smashingly successful business selling these tacos to his classmates, because nobody wanted to eat the crap they served in the cafeteria. These tacos were of excellent quality and even excellent-er size, and he was dubbed "That Taco Kid" by his peers. This went on for awhile, when suddenly the E. Coli virus wiped out the entire school system. To this day, nobody knows what it was that gave them all the virus. Pedro went on to be a multi-billionare-reporter-photographer-buisnessman-pornographer in the city of Boston. One day, while in his favorite taquitaria, the store was held up by two jalepeño-weilding bandits. He quickly dispatched the duo with white-hot beams of taco sauce from his eyes. The store owner was later quoted as saying "The sauce was both delicious and had the ability to sear through human flesh,". Pedro then went on to become a superhero, donning tights and suddenly becoming absurdly muscular. From here on out, he was known as Tacoman.

  • gir on the tacoman-must obey the tacoman.

Tacoman's Powers[edit | edit source]

Tacoman has many different super-abilities his power was first discovered when he was 8 he was at his first all you can eat buffet at speedygonzalez the 1st's all you can eat buffet where he was on his 11th taco in the first minute, suddenly he had a funny feeling like his body was filled with jumping mexicans (and how many mexicans cant jump just out of curiosity....)so then a taco appeared in front of him out of thin air then 2 then 3 then he lost control of his bodilly functions the tacos went flying everywhere they didnt hurt anyone it just made a mess so he ran to an orphanage across the street and there he stayed till he was adopted by the WONDER TWINS, most notably his power to create tacos out of thin air and throw them at people. These tacos are very painful to be hit by, especially if you end up with a hot chile in your eye. He also has many other powers, spanning

  • The ability to fire white-hot taco sauce from his eyes
  • The ability to devour tacos faster than the human mind can comprehend
  • The ability to summon a taco by turning surrounding oxygen into one
  • The power to deflect bullets with his rock-hard Taco Shell Of Justice
  • The ability to fly (hey, what kind of superhero can't fly?)but he can't fly fast making the whole process pointless
  • The power to shoot tacos out of everywhere even his
  • The ability to control the minds of any Taco Bell employee

Tacoman is also still finding out some of his powers. Tacoman also possesses tacorangs, small metal tacos he's found aren't good for eating. Despite their name, they're more akin to shurikens than boomarangs.

Tacoman's Supervillans[edit | edit source]

Tacoman has several arch-nemesis-es. His ultimate enemy, of course, is BorderPatrol Man. This is ironic because Tacoman's only link to Mexico is the whole taco thing and he's staunchly in favor of tight border control. BorderPatrol Man has challenged Tacoman several times. He can counter the taco projectiles with bullets from his standard-issue rifle. He can stop the white-hot beams of taco sauce by throwing milk balloons at Tacoman's eyes, thus taking away that power. This isn't Tacoman's only nemesis though. Other enemies include Hot Dog Dude, Hard Wok Man,Miley Cyrus, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster. This last one has been one of Tacoman's toughest battles, as it is difficult to fight against the one who created all living beings. He has also fought Doctor Doom, but in all fairness everyone fights Doctor Doom at least once.

Chipotle City's method of reaching Tacoman; the Taco-Signal