Click Here is a solicitation to click on something, as its constituent words imply. If you have got here, you probably found that someone in another article advised you to click on a link in order to access some resource. Unfortunately, the person who made that link didn't tell Uncyclopedia's team of trained llamas where the link should lead to, so instead they brought you to the only page they could find, this rather pointless definition of the phrase Click Here. For more information, please click here.
History[edit | edit source]
Originally discovered in 1302, Click Here was of little notoriety until 1973. During that time it went under various aliases, such as "Thou Should Jab in Thiseth Manner", "Clickest Herest", "The Clicking Should Not Be Most Unlike This and In This Place", "φμαι", "Aye, click har Aye, me parrot concurs".
Around 1973, DARPA conspired with Al Gore to create the internet. His work cut out for him, Al Gore constructed his vision of the internet, which primarily consisted of duct-taping two television sets together and hot-gluing an alarm clock on top. With his rudimentary knowledge of Internet protocols he craftily dumbfounded top military brass, who were both amazed and perplexed that both televisions could display the same information in synchrony.
When advertisers got wind that such an invention had been created, they quickly mobilized to create the mother of all advertisements, the pop-up ad. Imagine a world in which advertisers can throw ads in your face, and you literally can do nothing to stop them. This was their wet dream. However, they needed an easy way to transition from their ad to your wallet. Many books and journals were pored over, advertising wizards were consulted, and it seemed that these wonderful new pop-up ads were destined to disappear when an ancient text made mention of Click Here.
Click Here became an overnight success, and with its new notoriety it pushed the envelope of what it meant to click here. Making changes to its identity and variously going under cL1Ck H3R3, and cliquez ici, Click Here began amassing a huge fortune. Simultaneous with this gain of wealth, Click Here's capacity for overindulgence grew. Everything from food to scented crayons to crack became an addiction to Click Here. With each addiction Click Here became more wild and uncontrollable.
In late 1992, a severely intoxicated and inebriated Click Here was arrested for possession of several kilos of heroin, drug paraphernalia, and an Emmy. Due to Click Here's celebrity status, he was jailed for 2 days, and asked to pay a fine (which, to this day, he still owes). This event, and several hundred more, led Click Here to severe depression.
Today Click Here can be seen in various venues, mostly associated with porn, gambling, and enlarging various parts of one's anatomy.