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“Don't compare Trump with a chimpanzee. It's terribly rude to the chimpanzee.”

Chrumpanzees gather in groups poetically known as 'echo chambers', where they repeat the same calls to each other. Note their typical MAGA caps and small cranial capacity.
The combover did not change the chrumpanzee's nasty disposition.
The skill needed to create this stunning $70,000/year combover and daily makeover is nothing short of magical.

The chrumpanzee is a reptilian humanoid that is known for its shortsightedness, greed, and stupidity. Chrumpanzees have been known to get hopelessly "stuck" in heavy syrup (in-peached) when merely trying to eat some canned fruit. Despite thousands of hours of field observation, the chrumpanzee has never been known to tell the truth. However, note that, given its aims, the chrumpanzee's lies are adaptive, not dysfunctional just like the deceptive anglerfish it descended from. That species of anglerfish is known as a chrumpfish.

Evolutionary history[edit | edit source]

Ancient origins[edit | edit source]

The ancestor of the orange chrumpanzee, the orange chrumpfish, has a fleshy growth protruding from the top of its head deceptively resembling a yummy worm (as well as the hairdo of the 45th POTUS) that entices its prey to approach and become its next meal. While it may be hard to believe, the picture of a chrumpfish on this page is an actual, unretouched photo taken from the Un-uncyclopedia. No kidding. There is actually a chrumpfish, an orange anglerfish with a combover lure. Check out the link.

In the late Crustacean Period, descendants of the chrumpfish made the transition to land and began to evolve into the early chrumpanzee.

Modern "progress"[edit | edit source]

In the early Twitteration Period, the distinctive combover started to appear. Experts believe that this occurred due to the evolutionary need to lie to more people and incite the masses.

At the end of the Menstruation Period, chrumpanzees could be found throughout the United States, but are more common in the interior of the country in areas known as the 'red states'.

The Orangudon is the world's greatest expert on everything. This has been verified many times by the Orangudon itself.
The chRumpanzee is seen in this unusual photo with a tennis racquet instead of his usual rolled up, rump thumping magazine.
The chRumpanzee is the most dangerous variant of this species since it frequently acts as if it believes its delusions are true.