Big Nate
Big Nate is an American comic strip that takes the record for Most Unrealistic Character Ever (see image). The strip has been published in newspapers since the bathrooms at Uncyclopedia High were cleaned. (1991) (I'm looking at YOU, Janitor McSleazy!)
The series follows the misadventures of a sixth-grader named Nate, whose chronicles are so amazing they're too good NOT to mention, but you have to see below for it.
The series has its own series of books and a Nickelodeon Paramount+ series running from 2022 to... 2024?! C'MON, PARAMOUNT+!!!
Characters and Premises[edit | edit source]
Characters[edit | edit source]
Nate Wright[edit | edit source]
Nate Wright (born Nate Wrong, January 6, 1980-November 7, 2007) is the main character of the comic strip, book series, TV series, and the article you're reading about. He demonstrates several extraordinary talents, such as getting seven detentions in one day, being a C-Minus student after 30+ years of 6th grade DESPITE being an amazing chess player, being able to identify a baseball card down to the player, team, and year just by its scent, and having a deathly fear of cats. (really?)
Radioactivity and Genetic Mutation[edit | edit source]
Before Nate started middle school, he came in contact with radioactive asbestos stored in the basement. Miraculously, he did not get cancer, but it caused a genetic mutation where he caused to be 11 years old forever.
...
Well, YOU try creating an explanation for why he stayed at 11 for 30 years!
Death[edit | edit source]
On November 7, 2007, Nate choked to death while attempting to swallow a peppermint he had prepared for his social studies test (see image). Mrs. Godfrey, his social studies teacher attempted to perform the Heimlich maneuver on Nate, but it was too late. His funeral was held the next day, and a look-alike named Wrate Night performed for him from November 8, 2007 to today.
Martin Wright[edit | edit source]
Martin is Nate's overweight and clueless father/divorcee. He is a father who is so bad, he's good. Don't believe me? Pick up a Big Nate comic collection at your local Target, you may see some strips about him handing out healthy foods for Halloween, his horrible singing and guitar playing, his self-proclaimed 'athleticness', and his trash golf playing (you should see this, it's a real train wreck). In the books, however, he is better, as he is P.S. 38's first and only champion of the Mud Bowl (football, but muddy).
Ellen Wright[edit | edit source]
Nate's seldom-seen sister. She is the opposite of Nate, as she likes figure-skating, egg salad, is not afraid of cats, and is not named Nate. She infrequently/frequently dates Gordie, who works at Klassic Komix, Nate's comic-book heaven.
Francis Butthurst Pope (yes, really)[edit | edit source]
Francis is, despite his nerdiness, dropping baseball stats at the worst time, and relentlessness about spouting facts from his Book of Facts annual Christmas fact, Nate's best friend. He was one of the witnesses at Nate's death (bottom center).
Teddy √ Oritz (once again, yes, really)[edit | edit source]
Teddy is Nate's other best friend, and is should be the One and True Best Friend, and Francis can go and kick rocks. His middle name is because his parents are math teachers, and his uncle is a hypnotist, which has caused Nate to get in some weird situations...
Artur Pashkov[edit | edit source]
Artur is a student from Belarus and is Nate's enemy-turned-friend, despite Nate saying that Artur isn't as good as him. At first he was a huge hit with the ladies because he speaks in broken English (I mean really now, girls...), but soon became Jenny Jenkins' boyfriend, much to Nate's dismay. He disappeared to Turkey for 6 months, and formerly played for Enslave the Mollusk.
Jenny Jenkins[edit | edit source]
Jenny is Artur's girlfriend, and despite the relationship, Nate still was an ultra simp for Jenny until 2016, when Nate broke up with a 7th grade romance. The amount of times Nate tried to hit on Jenny/made basketball shots that Jenny would fall in love with her is... remarkable!
Gina Hemphill-Toms[edit | edit source]
Gina is Nate's archenemy due to her being a grade-grubbing teacher's pet, though there have been moments where she went to detention because of Nate.
Clara Godfrey[edit | edit source]
Clara is Nate's social studies teacher and overall worst teacher on the bases of weight, breath, and anger issues. So much so that Nate penned 20 FRIGGIN' INSULTING NICKNAMES for her, up to the point where you feel a tiny bit of sympathy for her. However, she tried to save Nate from death (see image, left, thinking, "Good gravy!") which would've changed Nate's POV of her, but alas...
And that's all that I have the strength to name. Read the books sometime if you want to see the others.
Premises[edit | edit source]
P.S. 38[edit | edit source]
P.S. 38 (stands for Public School 38), is the school Nate goes to. The school is over 100 years old, but its age has not been shown until the books, suggesting that the school was in very good shape, but had to let go for the book.
Enslave the Mollusk[edit | edit source]
Enslave the Mollusk is Nate's garage band, with Nate, Francis, Teddy, and, temporarily, Artur playing in the band. The do cover songs, and the amount of times they flubbed up is insane (for one, there was a power outage at one of their performances, which shows that Jebus does not like cover bands).
Femme Fatality[edit | edit source]
Femme Fatality is a possibly pornographic comic series that Nate frequently reads, and it proves to be so adult, Nate's dad also has taken an interest in it. This goes to show that maybe over-concerned parents saying, "Think of the children!" aren't all that bad...
Books[edit | edit source]
There are also a series of Big Nate books, which are extremely unoriginal books based on 2000's strips comic arcs so that new readers thinks these are original and a popular series. There are 8 books in the series.
Okay, that's basically all you need to know about ol' BN. We know you have your choice of wikis, so thank you for choosing Uncyclopedia.
Have fun reading the comic collection!