Algebra
- For other uses, see Algebra (disambiguation).
Alcamel Algebra (from the Arabian and Persian phrase "al jabr" meaning "all gibberish" and camel) is an evil subject that puts you at risk or even in danger of dropping out. Medieval Arabs invented the evil mathematical branch on the end of 16th century[1], increasing the risk of increased dropout rate and reducing the graduation rate. However, some students can survive by solving its mysterious expressions.
Origin[edit | edit source]
Algebra was created by the Muslim scientist al-Khwarizmi after achieving enlightenment in his musings about life on the toilet. The Babylonians and Indians claimed that al-Khwarizmi only copied their concepts, then changed their words to Arabic and Persian to make that nerd numbers become Masha Allah. However, al-Khwarizmi was later revered as the discoverer of Algebra and the number 0, and he became a figure who became the center of worship by the Algebra Cult and the Heavenly Heretical Cult of Mathematics Teachers. Despite this, Muslims don't seem interested in Algebra, and finally this knowledge was used by Westerners so they could create Cellphones, Twitter, YouTube, and Uncyclopedia. Meanwhile, Muslims just sit contemplating in the mosque, debating whether the Earth is round or flat.
Mystrious expressions[edit | edit source]
Algebra deals with mysterious equations called algebraic expressions. Algebraic expressions are very hard to solve because letters, numbers, and symbols are present. Only attentive students (or students who do not have attention deficit disorder can solve these expressions easily. LETTERS IN MATH!? SERIOUSLY!?
Negative effects[edit | edit source]
Algebra, a very evil subject in the world, has many negative effects on students. However, most teachers and principals do not believe that algebra poisons students. Some students who try to solve algebraic expressions finally die because algebraic expressions do not allow them to solve. It seems to be most dangerous for 6th graders, who think that they got this whole "math" thing handled until they get slapped in the face by this abstract, arcane bullshit, and staying up late getting poisoned instead of doing productive activities such as watching Power Rangers and He-Man. It has also been used for punishing some of the world´s worst people.
Student death[edit | edit source]
Students with attention deficit disorder cannot solve any algebraic expressions anymore because they are very slow; and during the time, they will enter an unusual life as a near-death student. A near-death student tries to restore its grades, but it can't. After the near-death phase, the student finally quits school without graduating, finally emerging from his coccoon as a dropout. Scientists say that this could be the "Circle Of Life" that Simba was talking about.
Amnesia[edit | edit source]
When a student tries to solve an algebraic equation, that equation will demand most of the student's focus and memory, making the students forget how to breathe in the life sustaining air around them for a short time.