User talk:Me me me

Rubbish

Hello, Me me me, I'm called Under User, and I'm here to welcome you to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions so far. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... No, it's a push, not a pull...

Now, you may be thinking this is just a standard welcome template that everyone gets on registering, but you'd be wrong. In fact, we have two basic templates, one of which we give to people who have made a bad start, and the other (this one) we give to people who look like they may want to stay and do things the right way. Hopefully, that's what you intend to do, and if it is, you might find these here links very handy:

That's me. Don't worry, I'm friendly! And I keep the manhole really clean.

• Beginner's Guide - gives you all the basics on getting started here. It's quite useful, so you may want to take a few minutes to read it.
• How to be funny and not just stupid - don't be offended by the name of this page, we're not implying you're stupid! It's a collection of really useful comedy writing tips. Many of our best writers still refer to this, so you may find it helps. Please do take a read, if nothing else it shows you exactly what we're aiming for here!

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links, particularly the second one. If you still want to find out more about Uncyclopedia, or you need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• How to get started editing on uncyclopedia
• Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue
• The FAQs - a few common editing questions answered for your convenience
• Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your friends
• Uncyclopedia:Chat - Follow the instructions here to come to the Uncyclopedia IRC channel.

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date. (Don't sign articles though!)

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, ask an admin on their talk page, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Browse our list of available mentors, and leave them a message on their talk page.

One final thing: as this is a humo(u)r wiki, people here tend to be joking in most of their conversations. If you bear that in mind, it makes many of the conversations a lot easier to understand! Once again, welcome! --UU - natter 14:00, Oct 29

"Rubbish"? Charming! ;-) --UU - natter 14:28, Oct 29

Well, perhaps "Annoying, but quite probably important section on being an uncyclopedian". Any better? - Me me me - A mine of Self-Centeredness 09:38, 30 October 2008 (UTC)

Nah, I get it, hence the wink. Like the style, Me me me, good luck about the place. --UU - natter 09:44, Oct 30

Ta very muchly! Oh, and before I forget, how do you change the colour of text in wiki sigs? --Me me me - A mine of Self-Centeredness 09:49, 30 October 2008 (UTC)

You'll be wanting to read this, which explains how to make a sig. To change text colour, use the <font> tags. Look at one of my old sigs to see how I did mine here. A handy list of html colour names to use can be found here. That do you for now? --UU - natter 09:54, Oct 30

Ta very muchly for the second time! --Me me me - A mine of Self-Centeredness 17:43, 30 October 2008 (UTC)