User:Theweelad/Penis tennis

“All you need is a "raquet"”

~ Oscar Wilde on Penis Tennis

“You are a total faggot for reading this article”

~ Jesus Christ on Penis Tennis

“That's a foul right there!!!! Stealing another Person's raquet is illegel”

~ Random Ref on The Rules

Origin

One young athlete who had never even played Penis Tennis, utilised steriods in an attempt to join the Olympic Team in 1998.

The game of penis tennis has it's orgins in some interweb chatroom that is by now defunct. It had died down for quite a while until some college student found it on the internet. Then Joey told Sally who told Susy who told Your Mom who told Satan who told Michael Jackson who told some bastard uncyclopedian who brought it like a plgue to the IRC network. Though still referred to as "that gay game some fucker made up" it is gaining popularity. Well that's an over statement. You still will be kicked out at even the mention of it but still...

Rules

There are no rules. Sort of. Well actually there are so deal with it fucker. It's quite like tennis. Except that then again it's not. Not even remotely. Except for the name. And the fact that you randomly shout "serve" and "game point" at random intervals. You also were really tight white outfits just like in normal tennis. There are also elemnts of football involved. But not soccer. Penis Soccer is quite different ( you don't even use a penis). Other than that there are some vague rules that no one can seem to remember. Not even Michael Jackson. THERE ARE TWO HOLY COMMADNDMENTS IN PENIS TENNIS: THOU SHALT NOT BAN FOR LOSING TO A NOOB and THOU SHALT NOT LOSE TO A NOOB OR THOU WILL FACE BUDDAH'S DISPLEASURE.

Scoring

Enemy fails to hit ball with raquet: ONE POINT

Touch down : SIX POINTS

Random orgasm during game: 20 POINTS

Suicide: -100

Tetris: FIVE POINTS

Magic Eight Ball breaks in half: 1000000000000000000000000 POINTS

You get a boner: PAMELA ANDERSON RUBS BODY LOTION ON YOUR THIGHS

Number of Players

Penis Tennis is like an orgy: the more participants, the better. Still you do need at least three. Two PLAYAH's and one ref.

Famous People That Play Penis Tennis

• our Mom
• Satan
• Micheal Jackson
• You
• Soulja Boy
• Hillary Clinton
• Mickey Mouse
• Emos
• Women