User:The Whattabatt/Cat o' nine tails

The Cat o' Nine Tails is a weapon that was commonly used in the 16th century for punishment. The weapon first came into use in ancient Japan when, upon sedating the mythical nine-tailed fox with a drugged severed head, a group of Japanese soldiers decided to play "Toss the Giant

Awww... isn't it cuuuute...how could you harm a poor thing like that?

Mythical Beast". After much frolicking and nine-tailed fox tossing-about, one of the soldiers accidentally hit one of his compatriots with said fox. The compatriot proceeded to exclaim "Ow, that hurt." And from this simple incident, the Cat o' Nine Tails was born.

How to Use A Cat o' Nine Tails

Step 1: Sedate Nine-Tailed Fox using severed head drugged with a sedative.

Step 2: Firmly grasp Nine-Tailed Fox by neck, head pointing towards you.

Step 3: Proceed to hit victim of your choice with the tails and/or torso of the fox. You may hit the victim on his/her head, legs, torso, or other part of body of your choice!

Step 4: For additional entertainment, enclose fox in small crate with victim and wait for the sedative to wear off.

A Sickening "Environmentally Friendly" alternative to the Cat o' Nine Tails. This whip is made out of plant fibers, cow organs, and pig skin.

Controversy

Controversy has arisen over the use of such a weapon, some have said that is "unsafe", "inhumane", "inconsiderate", and "just downright stupid". The controversy has actually gotten to the point where an anti-nine-tailed-fox-for-weapon-use group has formed. This group, aptly titled ANTFFWUG (Anti Nine Tailed Fox for Weapon Use Group) opposes the use of the "cat" for the possibility of coming awake and biting the user. And the fact that the fox is an animal. A mythical animal.