User:Nikobob

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The Adam[edit | edit source]

The Adam is a rare creature only found in the UK, it is incredibly hypocritical and is always in denile. It is heavily addicted to gaming and will rage heavily if disturbed.

Origin[edit | edit source]

No one knows exactly where it originated, but most scientists say that he spawned out of a game case. They believe that once opened it can never be shut again.

Biology[edit | edit source]

The Adam is a very complex creature mainly made up of rusty Ethernet cables and used power supplies, in the cranium location there is what is thought to be a hard drive which contains 1 terabyte of data, the rib cage structure is made up of aluminium framing which protects an alleged motherboard for the heart. The lifespan of the Adam is not yet known since knowledge of the Adam is scarce and only 1 major type is known and it is still alive currently and this creature is thought to have been spawned between 1995 and 1996.

Lifestyle[edit | edit source]

The Adam purely lives of the PS3's power and any excess power he uses to rage at people and this blocks his ability to know what he truly is. It shouts violently at parents as they fail to bring him food which he doesn't want to make himself or even retrieve for himself. He is highly lazy and is a gifted scavenger, far better than any vulture or hyena. Having an type of food that he likes is putting yourself in his target list, one he hones in you are doomed for, failure to gift him some of your food results in him attempting to rape you and fuck you in the rear.

Danger[edit | edit source]

The Adam is extremely likely to ragequit and have a hissy fit, you become in direct contact with the excess power therefore urging you to rage back and then the Adam will drain you completely by being a hypocrite and believe anything he does is better than a giant panda. He will be in denile of anything you say against his raging and argumentation draining. It is uncommon for you to feel the effects if he removes mode of speaking across console and this limits his ability to rage.

Sub-Species[edit | edit source]

There are more than one variant of this, apsnano as he is known on PSN is the main specimen of Adam. There are two more unknown accounts of the Adam but they are yet to be fully confirmed but we believe they get along with each other and reciprocate each others power towards one another balancing out the excess, this is a highly dangerous scenario if you are to stumble in on this and do something bad, you may die even though no accounts or records show that the Adam is likely to kill a victim.

Apsnano[edit | edit source]

This is the most dangerous Adam of them all and is highly likely to rage at you or even delete you from his presence, his voice is a very alerting one, once heard you should always be on guard, the Adam's have a very distinct laugh, if heard you will most likely laugh aswell, this is a very cunning trap, it is used to alure players in and then give them false security and when they are settled, it pounces with lightning strike precision and after that the victim will never be the same again. It is also known that the connection between you and him should always be good as the Adam's connection is a strong one yet sometimes is fluctuates creating denile about it sometimes allows the Adam to ride through the bad connection and even on occasion still manage to harm a victim.